


mermaid | alemanda

by simplybgt



Category: Britain's Got Talent RPF
Genre: F/F, alemanda, aleshadixon, amandaholden, mandalesha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 19:28:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 21
Words: 29,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29597631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simplybgt/pseuds/simplybgt
Summary: Alesha Dixon had a leg amputated from cancer when she was fifteen and she knows the comments that are made about it. Peg leg, pirate, freak. She's heard them all and hates it. Swimming is the only thing that's able to make her forget the comments and make her feel normal until she meets a fellow new teacher, Amanda Holden.Amanda Holden was born with a port-wine stain covering over half her face. She knows the comments that are made about it. Freak, alien. She's tried to cover up the birthmark with makeup and she does it even though it doesn't work well. She knows she different from every teacher at the school she's going to work at except for one other teacher, Alesha Dixon. Maybe, just maybe, they can make each other feel good about their different bodies.
Relationships: Alesha Dixon/Amanda Holden





	1. Context and Playlist

Alesha Dixon had a leg amputated from cancer when she was fifteen and she knows the comments that are made about it. Peg leg, pirate, freak. She's heard them all and hates it. Swimming is the only thing that's able to make her forget the comments and make her feel normal until she meets a fellow new teacher, Amanda Holden.

Amanda Holden was born with a port-wine stain covering over half her face. She knows the comments that are made about it. Freak, alien. She's tried to cover up the birthmark with makeup and she does it even though it doesn't work well. She knows she different from every teacher at the school she's going to work at except for one other teacher, Alesha Dixon. Maybe, just maybe, they can make each other feel good about their different bodies.

** Playlist **

Scars to Your Beautiful **by Alessia Cara**

Love the Way You Lie **by Rihanna and Eminem**

Catch Me **by Demi** **Lovato**


	2. prologue.

_alesha_

I've heard every mean comment made about my body. Every joke, ever whisper. It stings. Words sting and they always have.

I've heard the things people have said about the new teacher, Amanda. Grown up can be just as bad as children but their words sting worse.

 _freak, alien, monster._ I've heard that said about Amanda and about me. It never hurts less. Words do hurt and they will.

Amanda was born with a birthmark that covers over half of her face. I saw she caked foundation over it everyday so far this school year. It never hides it because it only makes it stand out more because she's trying to hide something she was born with.

I have only one leg. It's easier to hide but not by much. I try to hide it the best that I can and try to hide the sting of the words that's said about how I walk. I can't help it if my leg was amputated above the knee because of ostesarcoma when I was fifteen. I started swimming that year. I got stronger, the words started hurting less but they still sting. Even fifteen years after I first heard someone say them, even if they compliment me. There's always a mean comment after it.

_ amanda _

She wears jeans everyday to work. No matter how hot it is outside. It would be boiling and Alesha Dixon would still wear jeans. I've heard what people have said about her.

Cancer took her leg. That's why she walks funny. People think that she can't hear them bully her but I always hear it because they toss me into the conversation to bring up my birth mark.

The port-wine stain covers over half my face. I can't hide it no matter what I do about it. Even the best concealer and foundation can't hide what I was born with. I have wondered what it would be like if I hadn't been born with my birthmark.

I've never heard someone call me beautiful or pretty or gorgeous. It's always a bad thing I'm called.

I would _love_ if someone called me beautiful, pretty, or gorgeous.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! Welcome to this new fanfic. There will be mature themes in this such as domestic abuse and rape. I hope that you guys like this fanfic and what do you think is going to happen next? What did you like about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	3. chapter one.

_ alesha _

I looked around the naked office. Simon, the band director hadn’t brought his stuff into the office we were going to share yet as he was typically late. I had packed up all of our stuff when we had moved office from a tiny, cramped former costume closet to a much larger room that had originally been instrument storage. The office was more than double the size of our old one. All of the heavy furniture had been moved by the custodians for us, luckily. It wouldn’t do to meet the new drama teacher in a messy office, granted I had heard that her classroom was a mess as she was moving everything around for flexible seating for the students and to create a good atmosphere for learning acting.

I had heard that she looked a little different from other teachers but I hadn’t met her yet as we were going to have an arts subjects meeting once Simon arrived as he was the head of the arts department but he wasn’t here yet. I knew everyone else in the department, Paula, the American art teacher, Ryan, the American woodshop teacher, and then there was the new drama teacher who had taken over Louis job after he had a stroke over the summer hols. I knew Simon the best out of all of them though. He had been the one to push for me to be hired at the school we worked at now and told the headmaster not to worry about the fact I had a prosthetic leg and it could be seen during the interview.

I had osteosarcoma when I had been fifteen but the doctors treating me had thought it would be better to amputate since the cancer had spread past my knee. I walked funny because of the prosthetic being my knee joint as well. I had a stump of my leg that was left after amputation that ended mid thigh. My main chemotherapy doctor had said that I was lucky that the entire leg didn’t need to be amputated.

I didn’t feel lucky about having a stump of a leg. It caused problems in the bedroom with my boyfriend, Azuka. He had never once said he loved me in bed after sex, never said it once and we had been together for almost two years but I stayed with him because he always called me beautiful instead of saying he was in love with me. Every night when the prosthetic, which I lovingly called my stump holder, came off, Azuka would pull a disgusted face. I couldn’t blame him. The scar wasn’t that pretty and it traveled up what was left of my left leg but I could hide it with fabric in the bedroom so Azuka wouldn’t see it. Our relationship wasn’t that perfect as Azuka was always busy with trying to get a career with singing and her had many late nights from playing in clubs for gigs and I was often home alone. I had asked him if he ever wanted children and he didn’t and we didn’t have any pets either. We made our relationship work though.

“I’m here!” Simon announced, striding into the office and grinning when he saw me in my tank top and skinny jeans sitting on top of what was going to be my desk.

“Took you long enough. I’m dying to get somewhere air conditioned. Our office is broiling and the meeting was supposed to start half an hour ago in Paula’s room!” I reprimanded. “Why must you always be late?”

Simon gave me a cheeky smile in response and helped me off of the desk that I was sitting on. “Why aren’t you wearing shorts? It’s way too hot for jeans.”

“The new teacher can’t know that I’m disabled right off the bat!” I replied as we walked to the art classroom. I was greeted by the scent of one of Paula’s many teas being brewed on the hot plate. The woman was addicted to teas and I couldn’t blame her. Paula had gotten addicted to teas when she moved to London five years ago and she constantly had a pot of tea in her classroom, whether it was just for the constant pain she was in or for stress, it was always there. We greeted Paula and sat down at one of the tabled, Simon sitting across from me, Paula at the head of the table, and Ryan sitting next to Simon. That left only one seat open, right next to me as it was Paula’s desk. Paula jumped up to answer the door when the new teacher knocked, specifically the new drama teacher.

_amanda_

I gulped as I straightened my dress in front of the door to the art classroom. I knew no one that was going to be at the meeting for drama club. I barely knew Simon, the band director, much less the other three teachers that were going to be helping me with the drama club and department. I knew that it was Ryan Seacrest and Paula Abdul that were going to make the sets once the musical was chosen, although I truly had no idea what I was going to decide on and it was going to be the pit band that would play all of the music. I didn’t know who was going to be in charge of the singing for the musical though but I had heard things about her. I heard the basic things that she was nice and sweet and pretty but I had also heard the hurtful things that were said about her.

The fact she wore jeans everyday to work, no matter how hot it was outside. She never showed off her legs in dresses during concerts for the school band and chorus. She only had one leg and was called pegleg, pirate, and other things behind her back. She probably knew about the nicknames because hurtful things have a way of coming back to the person that they’re about.

I’ve had more than my fair share of hurtful nicknames since I was born. My parents didn’t know that I was going to be born with a port-wine stain that took up over half of my face and that it would spread down my neck as I grew older. Alien, freak, and other things I was called from as far back as I could remember. And as far back as I could remember, only my parents ever called me beautiful and parents are supposed to do that for their children, no matter what they look like when they make their entrance into the world.

I knocked on the door to the art classroom and was greeted by a short woman wearing shorts and a green t-shirt that made her eyes seem brighter as she gave me a once over, her eyes lingering on my birthmark. Her forehead shone with sweat from the heat of the school and she wiped it off with her forearm.

“You must be Amanda! I’m Paula, the art teacher here,” she greeted as she led me into the art room and then pointed at each person as she said their name. “That’s Simon. He’s the band director. That one is Ryan and he’s the woodshop teacher. And our chorus director is the lovely Alesha.”

Alesha glanced up as her name was said and her eyes flitted from my face back down to her lap. She could see the port-wine stain. Everyone could because my makeup was starting to fail from the heat in my classroom and in the school. The redness of the birthmark could be seen. I sat down next to Alesha and she set her hand on the table.

Her fingernails were painted red and they appeared to be chewed on by her. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat as Paula spoke again as she sat down, “tell us a little about yourself, Amanda. Interests, interesting things about you, how long you’ve been teaching for example.”

I gulped again. My throat was dry as I spoke but I didn’t sound hoarse, “I’ve been teaching for eight years now and drama has always been one of my passions. I’ve always dreamt about going on West End ever since I was a little girl but I could never find an acting job so I had to give it up last year and I decided it was time for a fresh start. I moved to London officially about a month ago.” I avoided the question about what was interesting about me because I didn’t want to mention the birthmark on my face although the group had noticed it. Ryan was staring at it and once he realised he was, his glance went down into his lap.

“We need to decide on an Autumn term musical now. Have you given it any thought, Amanda?” Simon interrupted, saving me from an awkward silence after I had finished speaking about myself. Simon gave me a kind smile and set his hands on the desk.

“Not really,” I admitted. “I always have trouble with it.”

“We can help with it. I’ll help you with picking it,” Alesha blurted out. She blushed as we made eye contact and her gaze went to the desk again. Alesha seemed to be awkward around me and I couldn’t blame her. It was just the way that people acted around me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! So it sounds like Simon and Paula might end up being a couple because of Simon's crush on her but he's flirting with Amanda. What do you think is going to happen next and what did you love about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	4. chapter two.

_ alesha _

I glanced around Amanda’s classroom as I entered it. We had broken up our meeting to go and get something cold to drink. Paula had volunteered and Simon had gone with her. It was a well-known fact in the school and within the staff that Simon was trying to get Paula to be his girlfriend. They were always flirting with each other during meetings but at this meeting, Simon didn’t flirt with Paula once as he knew it was just too hot and trying to flirt would make Paula irritated with him. Amanda’s classroom was looked to be almost ready but there was a giant stack of scripts of musicals and many copies strewn about the center of the circle of desks that Amanda had set up. She was sitting on the cooler tile floor with one of her legs to her side and her left foot touching her right calf. It was a basic dance stretch position that Amanda was in.

I had told Amanda that I was going to help her with picking the Autumn term musical during the meeting and she had replied we could start looking for the musical after the meeting ended. Amanda tucked a strand of hair behind her ear as she flipped through one of the scripts for a musical and scanned the page with her eyes.

“Any luck so far?” I asked quietly, sitting down on the ground next to Amanda.

“Not at all,” she replied, shaking her head. “Some of them I don’t think there would be enough kids to do it or the music is copyrighted heavily and we would have that much money left to buy supplies to do the sets.”

I picked up a copy of the script that she was looking at, Into the Woods. “That one would be tough to stage and get the kids ready to sing the songs. Especially for the boy that’ll be Jack. Castle in the Sky is such a hard song for males to sing.”

“There’s no way we can do it in time,” Amanda complained. She put the script into the pile of scripts next to her, all ones that she had rejected. “Maybe I’ll just have to do a play instead.”

“I promised I would help you with picking out the musical, Amanda,” I countered. We heard a knock on the open door to Amanda’s classroom and Amanda looked up, grinning as Paula came in with two iced coffees for us.

“Your usual, Alesha,” Paula said as she handed me the plastic cup. “And here’s yours, Amanda. They made it wrong twice because you made it complicated.” Amanda grinned and stood up as she took the cup out of Paula’s hand.

“An iced caramel latte with almond milk, two sugars, and an extra pump of caramel is not that hard to make and it’s not that complicated,” Amanda spoke and sipped on her coffee.

“Almost everyone in the arts department has an easy order. Especially Alesha,” Paula replied. “All she drinks is black coffee.”

“As black as my soul,” I joked. I took a sip of my coffee and smiled. I only drank my coffee black as most flavourings were too sweet for me or I just didn’t like the taste of them. I had gotten used to drinking black coffee as there had never been any creamers in my childhood home when I had started drinking coffee. Most of the time, I would drink it as strongly brewed as possible which required me to make a pot in the evening and let it steep overnight for the next morning.

“I’ll let you get back to finding a musical. Let me know as soon as you’ve decided!” Paula called as she left Amanda’s classroom. Amanda sat back down on the tiles and pulled out the next script from a box. She hummed as she flipped through the script and looked at the song lyrics.

I sat down on the floor next to Amanda again and took a script out of one of the many boxes that surrounded her. I flipped through the script and started humming one of the songs from it, singing the lyrics to it in my head. Amanda looked at me as I hummed and she smiled.

“Find one that we can do?” She questioned as she tossed the script she was looking through into the discarded script pile.

“Not yet. I just know the music for this one,” I replied. I remembered that the play was American and it was about American kids. The drama club kids wouldn’t be able to get into their characters that well with this musical. “The chorus students sang Seasons of Love from it last year and it gets stuck really easily in any drama or chorus student’s head.”

_ amanda _

The swimming pool in the rec center on the school’s campus was almost empty. There was only one person in it and she was just swimming lengths. I never usually went swimming but today was too hot to think about doing anything else but lounge around in the water. The woman swimming was missing her left leg above the knee and it didn’t hinder her while she was moving through the water.

I got into the water and swam to the deeper end, treading the water as I watched her. She was familiar to me but her hair was tucked up into a swim cap to keep it dry. Her face was turned from my direction as she swam and she stopped when she got to the deep end to take a break.

“Hey, Amanda,” the woman spoke. She wiped the water from her eyes and opened them. “I thought it was you.” Alesha took the swim cap off of her black hair and tossed it onto a pool bench with her other things.

“Hi,” I breathed. I hadn’t known that the reason why she walked with a limp was because she had a prosthetic leg but she moved so gracefully in the water, like she had been born without her left leg from mid calf down. “I didn’t know that you swim.”

“You haven’t known me for long enough. I usually coach the swim team here during the winter term,” she replied. “I swim almost every day.”

Alesha pulled herself out of the pool and she hopped over to her towel on the bench. She sat down and dried her left leg off first, taking care with the scar on the bottom of what was left of her left leg. I ducked my head when she saw me looking at her leg.

“You’re curious aren’t you?” She asked, putting her prosthetic back on. I nodded and shifted in the water. “I’ll tell you tonight if you want to maybe get together at your place so we can decide on the musical.”

“I need your number then so I can text you my address,” I replied. I swam back to the shallow end of the pool and got out. I dried my face and arms off with my towel and took my phone out of my bag. I pulled up my contacts and walked back to Alesha. I handed her my phone and she put her number in.

“Just text me the address later today,” she said as she got up from the bench, wrapping the towel around her body. “I’ll see you later, Amanda.” She left the the pool area and went back to the lockers. I put my phone back with my stuff and I got back into the pool. At least Alesha hadn’t said anything about my makeup failing because I had gotten my face wet.

I didn’t wear the best waterproof makeup so it tended to rub off when my face got wet and i would dry it off. My towel had a small stain on it from me drying off my face earlier. I swan a couple of laps and went under water again. I sank to the bottom and i crossed my legs, holding my breath. I loved being under water because it could make everything, even my face, look normal.

No matter how much makeup i wore, I could never quite cover the port-wine stain, even with the best foundation that I could find. It would cover my face for the morning but it would always start failing by afternoon and i would have to reapply it if i was at work. It was too hot today for me to bother with reapplying the foundation to my face because it would fail even quicker, no matter how much I would have to cake it on. I came back up for breath and I pushed my hair back out of my eyes. It was almost impossible for my hair to stay where I wanted it to but I didn’t care about it as i had learned to deal with it.

I had learned to deal with the port-wine stain on my face and even though I hated it and tried to cover it up to the best of my abilities, it was still always there and I hated the fact that it was always going to be a part of me. I would have to deal with having a port-wine stain for my entire life and deal with the the stares, the comments, and the hurt caused by it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] Hey guys! Sorry for the late chapter but I had to work today. What did you like about this chapter and what do you think is going to happen next? Bye until the next chapter!


	5. chapter three.

alesha

I got the text from Amanda with her address after I got back to the flat I shared with my boyfriend, Azuka. Azuka wouldn’t be home until later, much later as he usually came in when I was asleep and he would be sleeping when I would leave for work in the morning. The only time we could be able to spend time with each other was during the weekends, when we would both be off of work. Azuka worked in a dance studio and he would be teaching classes for adults later during the day and he wouldn’t be home until close to midnight because he was going to practice for an audition to be a backup dancer for some pop star at the studio. The flat was little but it was big enough for the both of us. We had a ground floor flat so it was a little smaller than the other flats in the building as stairs was right by our flat’s front door.

I texted Amanda that I was going to be at her place around seven so I could get something to eat first and get showered and changed. It was five in the evening right now so I had about two hours before I needed to be at Amanda’s flat. It would be just enough time for me to get ready and leave.

[]

I got showered and changed into a pair of shorts and another tank top. Amanda had already seen that I was disabled because she had seen me swimming. She had the usual reaction to seeing me with the prosthetic visible, speechless and shocked. People who saw me with the prosthetic could never figure out the right thing to say to me so they often tried to ignore it but they always stared at it, even if they didn’t notice that they were. Amanda hadn’t stared at it that much though and it had made me surprised that she didn’t. I rang the doorbell and Amanda came to the door wearing a red sundress that showed off the freckles on her shoulders and chest.

“Come in, Alesha!” She greeted and stepped aside so I could go into her flat. The flat looked like it had been lived in already, not just moved in with boxes everywhere. Amanda had already organized and had unpacked all of her things even though she had been living in the flat for three weeks. I went into the flat and went into the living room. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“Just a water,” I replied. Amanda had a couple of boxes that weren’t yet unpacked and they were labeled ‘scripts’. These were the boxes that she and I were going to go through to find a musical that we could do for the Autumn term. I sat down on the couch and brought my legs onto the couch, crossing them underneath each other. Amanda brought a bottle of water into the living room and she stumbled on the rug in front of the couch when she got to it, catching herself from falling on me, just inches from my face. Her lips were an inch from mine and she blushed as she sat down, handing me the bottle of water.

"I'm sorry, Alesha," she apologized, blushing as red as her sundress. "I'm not usually that clumsy. It was an accident."

"It's alright, Amanda. These things happen," I replied, placing my hand on her arm. Her blush deepened with the contact and I pulled my hand away from her. "Let's try to find a musical tonight."

"Alright," Amanda responded. She picked up one of the boxes and she set it in between us. She pulled out a script and began to flip through it to find songs and turned on her phone, looking for the songs at the same time. She clicked on the song and it started to play from her phone. "How about this one. This is the most famous song from it."

I hummed and replied, "I'm not sure about it. The music seems old." I took the script from Amanda and looked at some of the lines. She had been looking at _Spring Awakening_. "We would get in trouble with administration with this."

Amanda took the script back from me and tossed it aside. "Alright. Next one then."

She pulled out the next script and immedietly tossed it into the rejected script pile. "The Scottish Play," she explained. "I am never going to do that one because of the superstitions."

_ amanda _

I had almost kissed Alesha. A woman who I was sure was straight. I couldn't stop thinking about it as we looked through for a musical that could be preformed by the drama club and listened to a song from each of the musicals we looked at. I had apologized for the almost kiss but I didn't mention it. Alesha had seemed just as flustered as I had been about it.

She had been blushing, although she didn't realize it. She had put her hand onto my arm while I had apologized and I had gotten even more flustered. Alesha didn't know that I was lesbian and I was certain she was straight. There wasn't anyway that I could get her to say that she was straight without asking her if she had a boyfriend and even then, I had the chance of her saying no and not being able to tell her sexuality from her answer and I couldn't just ask her if she was straight.

That wasn't something I was ever going to ask Alesha, even if for some reason, we were talking about sexuality. Alesha hummed a song from one of the musicals as she looked through the script to see if we could do it.

"What musical is that?" I asked.

" _Matild_ a," Alesha replied. She gave me the directors copy of the script so I could look at it. She hummed some more of one of the songs. "It's one of my favourites because I love Roald Dahl."

"So do I," I agreed. I looked at the copy and played the song that Alesha had been humming. It was a good musical and it was one that almost every student in the drama club was going to know already because they would know the story it had been based on. "Let's do _Matilda_ for the musical."

"So it's final we have a decision?" Alesha asked. I nodded and I put the rejected scripts into the box that we had been going through.

"It's the final decision," I responded. "I just have to order the scripts based off of the number of people signed up to do drama club this year on the first day of school but I can order the lead parts and a copy of the music for you and Simon to make copies of for the ensembles and pit band."

"How many scripts do we need to order?" Alesha questioned. She opened her water bottle and took a sip of it.

"At least fifteen to begin with. I have to count the characters that have lines," I replied. "But we finally have a musical and we can tell the others what it is."

"Took us all day," Alesha added in, grinning, "but we did it." She put the cap on to her water bottle and checked the time on her phone. "Oh god, it's already ten! We've been trying to find the musical for three hours!"

"Last year it took me a month to figure out the musical for the school I used to work at. Do you have to go home already?" I replied. I was hoping that Alesha could stay for a little while longer and we could talk. She still hadn't yet explained why she had a prosthetic leg to me and she had said she would tonight.

"I could stay for a little while longer. Azuka won't get home until midnight anyways," Alesha said in response. "You were curious about my leg earlier, right?"

"Yeah," I replied. "I w-want to know what happened."

"I lost it to cancer when I was fifteen. Ostesarcoma. The doctors had to amputate from mid calf down to save what hadn't been diseased and it wasn't much," Alesha said. "I got lucky it didn't spread farther up my leg or else I would have had to have the amputation up to my hip to save it. I got my first prosthetic on my sixteenth birthday, six months after losing my leg to cancer."

"Oh wow," I breathed. "I heard you don't ever show off your prosthetic to students that often. Is it only your swim team students that see you with the prosthetic?"

"Yep," she replied. "No one has ever seen it outside of the pool. I keep it covered. That's why I wore jeans earlier today. I didn't want you to know that I'm disabled right away but everyone always finds out and talks about it."

I nodded in understanding. I knew what Alesha was talking about all too well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! Some drama is starting. When do you think Amanda's going to come out of the closet to Alesha? What do you think is going to happen next and what did you love about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	6. chapter four.

_ alesha _

School had started back up and I hadn't gotten another chance to speak with Amanda at all in the past week school had been in session. I was almost giddy with excitement with going to the first drama club meeting of the year during the second week we were back in school. I had to get through the school day first before the drama club meeting, which would be directly after school let out. I went into the auditorium and I turned on the piano. There was no piano player hired by the school this year as the woman who had played piano for the chorus and sometimes band, had retired from teaching piano and from playing it for school. I was a little upset by it as I usually did not play the piano during class as I needed to be able to conduct and cue different parts in the songs. I had picked five songs for the chorus to sing, two Christmas songs, a pop song, a traditional song, and one song from Broadway and West End. I had already passed out the music sheets for each voice part and today we were going to start with singing the songs.

I began to warm up my voice as I pressed the keys on the piano, even though I was going to be helping the students with warming up their voices. It was easier on me if I warmed up my voice before school started so I would be ready to get right into the warm up for the students' voices. I had always done this in one of the practice rooms but I knew that they were filled with instruments brought into the rooms over the summer and extra chairs and stand racks. There would be no space for me to be able to turn on one of the pianos in the rooms for me to warm up my voice.

I hummed as I played, gradually starting to sing the warm ups as time passed by. It usually took me about fifteen minutes to do a proper warm up for myself and twenty minutes for students to completely warm up their voices as they tended to talk. I sang out the warm up, getting closer to hitting the higher notes that a soprano could hit but I could never quite get up to it. I would sound like a dying dog if I tried to hit some of the high notes of the soprano parts in the music as I was an alto. The sopranos always had someone that would continue warming up with them after they were warmed up by me so they would be able to hit the high notes.

I sat up straighter on the piano bench as I got closer to the high notes of the scales I was doing. It had always been a habit for me as it would open up my chest so I would sound better as I sang. I sounded close to warmed up so I shut the piano off but I kept it plugged in. I still had fifteen more minutes to wait until the school day was actually supposed to start. I headed back to mine and Simon's office to grab my laptop and I could hear music playing as I walked down the hallway to the band room.

I knew that it was Amanda playing the music as she had done that since the first day of school. She had told me then that it helped her relax to get the day started and it created a calming environment for her students. I could hear Amanda faintly singing along to the show tunes and smiled to myself.

Amanda was quickly becoming one of my friends as we were going to be working with each other often for the drama club because the club did a musical near the end of the autumn term and a musical near the end of the spring term during the last month of school. There was even a play that Amanda would direct by herself at the end of the winter term with a student director, usually a student in their last year of school.

I grabbed my laptop and went back into the auditorium after saying hello to Simon. Simon was actually at work somewhat earlier, contrasting with the fact that he was usually at work five minutes before the bell rang. He was almost always late because of his son making him run late as he had to drop him off at nursery. I just had to make it through today before I would be able to go to the drama club meeting with Amanda and it seemed to be dragging by,

_ amanda _

The first drama meeting was going be be starting in less two hours. The meeting was going to be at the end of the school day as the kids who were trying out were going to show up to get information on how I ran auditions and what the process was going to be like with a different director. I had my planning period as the last period of the day, which also meant that I was in charge of one of the study halls so it was going to be in my classroom.

I had gotten my classroom completely set up by the time that the first day of school had arrived and it looked cute. I had decorated the walls with posters of Broadway and West End musicals and plays and I had placed knick knacks that related to musical theatre on the bookshelves with my copies of the scripts my classes would be reading through during the school year. I had a CD player by my desk so I could play music before school started and so I could listen to the radio while I worked on grading either homework or papers after school. I had purposely assigned no homework to my classes yesterday so I wouldn't have anything to grade after school and have to stay even later because of the drama club meeting. I couldn't wait to get to the meeting as I knew some of the students that had signed up to do drama club this year were also in at least one of my theatre classes. I put on music during the passing time for students while I waited for the students in my study hall to show up in my classroom.

One of the girls that was in my study hall that came in first was also in my first period drama class. She sat down, pushed her glasses up her nose and pulled her laptop out of her backpack. A couple of other girls came in after her and they sat down beside her, striking up a conversation about something. I watched them out of the corner of my eye as I began to take attendance for the class. There wasn't that many students in my study hall so it meant it would hopefully be quiet but the class that I had for sixth period was also small as it was the kids interested in doing drama as their major in university but they were loud, despite only having eight students in the class.

A couple of boys came in the classroom, each one of them heading to desks on the opposite side of the room. One of the boys grinned when he saw the posters on the wall and the scripts on the bookshelf beside him. I called out attendance when the bell rang so I would know each of my students' names. I had never been that good with remembering names but if I could associate something with that person's name, I could remember it easier.

The study hall was pretty much silent, as it had been for the past week but the group of girls did laugh every few minutes about something on their phone or laptops. The boys had plugged themselves into their laptops with their earbuds as they watched videos or T.V. shows. The bell rang at the end of the period. It seemed as though the period had dragged on to me but now I only had my afternoon homeroom at the end of the day before the first drama meeting of the year. One of the guys didn't move to get up when the bell rang, not bothering to pack his stuff up. He was one of the boys in my homeroom and he was silent, except for saying 'here' when I called for attendance.

I had a large homeroom that was eerily quiet but it was mainly because they didn't know me that well as I hadn't told them much about me, except for the bare basics. I had told them I had been teaching for ten years, I had just moved to London a little over a month ago but I didn't say much else. There really wasn't a need to say anything more about me as my students would learn more about me as time would go by.

The homeroom period passed by slowly, like the clock was ticking even slower than usual but it was just because I was excited about directing the drama club in a new school and new environment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! Amanda and Alesha are both excited about the drama club meeting. What do you think is going to happen next and what did you love about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	7. chapter five.

_alesha_

I had to say that the first drama meeting of the school year had gone well and Amanda was clearly excited about directing the drama club at a new school for her. The drama club at our school was little but it had started growing over the years as more of the younger students were starting to sign up whenever a new play or musical was announced for the auditions. This was the largest the drama club had ever been in my years of teaching chorus at one of London's smaller public schools. The school was moderately sized but it was small when compared to other schools in our area of London. It was a good school though and I had heard that the tuition was high for students to be able to attend but sometimes a student could earn a scholarship when they were in preparatory school.

The drama club meeting had gone well and all that had shown up to the meeting had signed up for audition groups and a time that would work best for them. All of the times for auditioning were going to be afterschool and Amanda and I still had a day left before we had to start auditioning kids for parts. We had made copies of the songs and had decided that if a student wanted music for the singing part of their audition, they had to make sure a piano version was available for me to play or they could play the music themself while they sang. It wasn't a requirement that they had to provide music for them to sing to in the audition but it was going to help Amanda and I if they did bring music with them.

I unlocked the door to my flat and I was greeted with the smell of cooking pizza. Azuka knew I always craved pizza for some reason when I was on my period. It was a bit funny that he remembered that my period was starting today when I hadn't told him yesterday that we wouldn't be able to make love over the weekend.

"I'm home, Az," I yelled as I put my bag into the entryway of our flat and took my laptop and a stack of papers with signatures from my students' parents on them.

"In the kitchen, babe!" Azuka replied. I went into the kitchen and Azuka was taking the pizzas out of the oven. We would normally share one as I could easily down a third of a small pizza by myself and the second one would be for Azuka if he had danced that day. He put the pizzas on top of the oven and he took off the oven mitt. "I knew that you're starting today." He gave me a grinned and pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"You know me way too well now. I can't hide anything from you," I replied. I kissed him on the cheek and released myself from his hug. I got the pizza cutter out and set it beside the two pizzas. I got out plates for us to put the pizza slices on and Azuka got out the cups. "Why are you home so early?"

"I don't have a dance class at six anymore. I'm off at four thirty now," he replied, getting out the milk and pouring it into the two glasses before returning the jug back to the refrigerator.

"That's good then. We'll be able to spend more time with each other now," I spoke. I cut the two pizzas into slices and put two of the slices on to my plate. "Are we going to watch a movie because we're having pizza for dinner?"

"Yep. Go find one on Netflix we haven't seen yet and no musicals," Azuka replied. I went into the living room with my plate and I turned the T.V. on and turned on the X-Box. I logged into Netflix and waited for it to load. Azuka brought his plate into the living room and set it on the arm of the couch.

He went back into the kitchen and returned with our two glasses of milk. "Can we watch something Disney?" I asked.

"But aren't all Disney movies musicals?" Azuka asked, sitting down on the couch and lifting a piece of pizza to his mouth.

"No. I want to watch _The Incredibles_ and it's not a musical," I retorted, turning the movie on and settling back against Azuka's body as I ate.

_amanda_

I turned the T.V. on and I settled into my couch. I couldn't really focus much on the T.V. show that I was watching. All I could remember was that I had almost kissed Alesha in the spot where I was now sitting.

I had tripped and I had almost fallen on top of Alesha. Our lips had almost connected but there was still a gap of an inch. I had been so tempted to close that gap and kiss Alesha but hadn't been worth it to ruin a new friendship just to kiss a woman that my romantic attraction for would fade within six months and she wouldn't talk to me for as long as we worked together if I had kissed her.

I couldn't tell Alesha that I was feeling romantic attraction for her. She probably had a loving boyfriend and was completely straight. There was no such thing as making someone turn your sexuality. It was impossible to do and I had tried to make myself believe that I was straight in high school but I failed, giving into the fact that I was lesbian and had to come out to my mother and my step father.

I had my first girlfriend in university, which followed a quick succession of more girlfriends after we broke up. Cheryl had been a nice girl but I hadn't wanted to spend the rest of my life with her and she could get annoying a lot. We broke up after four months of dating and we talked occasionally but not much.

Then came more girlfriends and I broke up with each one of them. There was all one common thing about them. I couldn't see myself spending the rest of my life with them and loving them for the rest of my life. I only saw that with Alesha and we had barely known each other for three weeks and she was straight. There was no way that we would ever date but yet I was having romantic feelings for her.

That was the way most of my crushes had gone for the past five years. Almost each woman would turn out to be straight and therefore off limits and they would end our friendship. I needed a new dating pool and a fresh start so I had moved to London.

I shut off the T.V. as I wasn't watching whatever show I had turned it on to and got up from the couch. I checked my phone for notifications and there was none, not one single text or notification from a game. I went to my bathroom with my phone in my hand and turned the water on for a shower.

I got into the shower when it warm and after I had picked the first song that I would hear in the shower. I washed my body quickly and I noticed that my vagina was soaking wet from thinking about Alesha. My clit gave me a jolt when I had brought my hands in between my legs to wash myself there.

I had gotten horny from thinking about a straight woman. It had happened before and it meant I wouldn't be able to sleep until I climaxed. I got out of the shower and dried off. I went back to my bedroom with my towel around my body and sat on my bed.

I would have to masturbate tonight if I wanted to get some sort of sleep. I took off the towel and I set it on the ground next to my nightstand. I got a dildo out of my nightstand and moved to the center of my bed, resting my head on one of my pillows. I spread my legs and began to rub the dildo against my vagina's lips. I moaned quietly and brought my other hand up to my breast.

I circled my nipple with my finger, making it into a pointed peak as I brought the dildo into myself. I moaned louder and I rubbed at my nipple again. I started to move the dildo within myself, getting used to the size of the sex toy. There was a part on it that was meant to stimulate my clit but it wasn't enough.

I moved my hand from my breast and brought it down to my clit, flicking at it gently. I moved the dildo quicker and my walls were beginning to tighten as I moaned. I had gotten myself hornier than I had thought when I had been thinking about Alesha. I gave a final moan, moaning out Alesha's name in pleasure as my eyes closed with my orgasm.

Hopefully I would be able to get some sleep now with my need for pleasure satisfied with a good orgasm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! Smutty little chapter here for you. I hope you liked It! What do you think is going to happen next and what did you love about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	8. chapter six.

_alesha_

I sent the text to Amanda asking her if she wanted to go swimming with me afterschool when we finished doing auditions for _Matilda._ The last day of auditions was going to be only an hour long as there wasn't that many students that had signed up to do the last day. We had to cut two hours off of the last day of auditions because there hadn't been that many kids signed up to do it.

Amanda had texted me back that she would love to go swimming with me after auditions ended. Auditions were over now so I headed to the campus pool. I went into the locker room and took the one piece bathing suit out of my bag. I changed into it quickly and grabbed my goggles, swim cap, and my towel.

I went into the pool room and I put my hair up into a ponytail to make it easier to put it into the swim cap. I put the swim cap on and I took off my prosthetic before I put on my goggles. I got into the pool in the deep end and began to tred water while I waited for Amanda to come out of the locker room.

She came out of the locker room with a bikini on and her towel draped over her arm. She set the towel down next to my stuff on the bench and got into the pool at the shallow end. She swam over to me and treded water next to me.

"You ready to swim?" I asked.

"Yeah," she replied. "Race you to the other end of the pool."

"It's on." We swam to the edge of the deep end and our feet touched the wall as we took off. I breaststroked to the other end of the pool and touched the wall with my hand. I spun around in the water and pushed off with my feet to go the other way.

I came up from breath and saw that Amanda had just reached the shallow end of the pool. I swam faster, determined to beat her in the race. She breaststroked to where I had been when I had seen her and she also came up for breath.

I reached the other end of the pool before she did and I came up for air again. "I won," I spoke, breathing heavily from swimming that fast.

"I was so close. You almost lost!" Amanda retorted. She had been close to winning and she had taken over the lead halfway down the lane but I had taken over her before we had reached the wall.

Amanda pushed her hair back out of her eyes and she wiped the water off of her face. "I think we need to race in the pool at least once a week. Maybe I'll be able to beat you one day. You're like a mermaid!"

I shrugged my shoulders and let go of the wall on the deep end. I tred the water again and nodded. "I've been compared to mermaids before. Thank you though. It's because I had done hydrotherapy after my leg had been amputated." I grinned at Amanda and she dived under the water.

She touched the pool floor and kicked her legs up into the air. She was doing a handstand under the water. She came up gracefully and breathed heavily. She had been in the handstand close to a minute.

"I can never resist it," Amanda explained. "I always have to do a handstand in the water whenever I'm swimming."

"I haven't done tricks in the water for years," I replied. I dived under the water and did a handstand, coming out of it in a flip under the water. I came back up and Amanda was already swimming the length of the pool again.

I swam the length of the pool using the butterfly stroke. I hadn't practices that one in a while. I reached the end of the pool and turned around. Amanda was already almost halfway back to where she had started so I switched to doing a breaststroke. She reached the wall before I did this time and came up, gasping for air.

I followed after her and I held onto the wall again so I could catch my breath.

"This is a lot of fun. Thank you for asking me to go swimming with you today, Alesha," Amanda said, getting up from the pool and sitting on the edge.

"You're welcome! Let's make it regular then," I replied. Amanda nodded in agreement and she got back into the pool.

"Race again?" She asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"You're on!"

_ amanda _

Swimming with Alesha had been a lot of fun and I was surprised at how fast Alesha was in the water. With each race we did, she would beat me although I did come close a couple of times to beating her. I wrapped the towel under my arms as I got out of the shower in my flat.

Alesha and I had swam for a good hour before we got out for good and said our goodbyes to each other in the locker room after we changed into the clothes that we had been wearing before going swimming. I dried off in my bathroom and went into my bedroom.

I slipped into pyjamas and I settled into my bed. I had already eaten dinner as I had picked something up from a fish and chips shop on my way home and ate some while I was driving home. Swimming had almost completely worn me out as I had been swimming for almost an hour and doing five races with Alesha. It had been so much fun that we had decided that we were going to go swimming on Fridays once a week with each other.

I opened up my laptop and I searched for mermaid tails that I could buy. I had been obsessed with mermaid when I was little but I had given up the obsession when I was fifteen. I searched for inexpensive but good quality ones. I was hoping to find two of them, one for Alesha and one for me.

It was going to be a surprise for Alesha to try swimming in for next Friday, if it was going to arrive in a week. I found one that would compliment Alesha's one piece bathing suit that she had worn for swimming today. She had said that she only wore that bathing suit when she was swimming by herself or with the swim team. I clicked on the order button and bought the tail for Alesha.

I found a tail that was in my favourite colour, red, and it matched my favourite bikini. I had been wearing that bikini when I had seen Alesha swimming for the first time and had seen her prosthetic leg. I ordered the tail for myself and paid for the order. The two tails would be in by the next Friday, when Alesha and I would go swimming next.

I clicked on a new tab and headed to YouTube. If I was going to be wearing a mermaid tail, I would have to learn how to swim like a mermaid. I watched the first video that came up in the search but it wasn't that useful. It looked fairly easy to swim in a mermaid tail but it was going to require a lot of core strength for me to do.

Alesha already had the core strength required for swimming successfully in a mermaid tail because she swam almost everyday in the school pool. Her stomach was completely flat and it looked like she didn't have an ounce of fat on her body.

I was more curvy than Alesha was. My stomach wasn't flat at all, but rounded instead and my hips were wider than Alesha's were. My breasts were even bigger than Alesha's were. Alesha's breasts were tiny but they complimented her figure. She was tall and petite and I was short and curvy.

Our bodies were completely different but I was hoping to lose some weight with going swimming with Alesha once a week. I had a hard time with losing weight and keeping it off. I closed the two tabs I was in and I plugged my laptop into its charger.

I turned my alarm on for the next morning and I set my laptop on my nightstand. I got out of my warm bed, shutting off the light and climbing back into bed blindly. I laid on my side as I closed my eyes and sprawled out in my bed. My body was absolutely exhausted from swimming but it was a welcome exhaustion. I hadn't slept that well the past couple of nights because I had been thinking about Alesha.

It was definate to me that I had a crush on her but either she didn't see that or she was completely straight. It was a total gamble if she had a crush on me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! Amanda ordered mermaid tails for her and Alesha, despite her age. I really want one. What did you like about this chapter and what do you think is going to happen next? Bye until the next chapter!


	9. chapter seven.

_ alesha _

I sat in the music office alone. Simon hadn't been in school today as his son had been sick so I had taken over his classes, combining them with my own which proved easier with the band and chorus classes than with the others. It was afterschool and I was waiting for the script reading of _Matilda_ to start.

It was pretty quiet in the school since it was afterschool. I liked it when I was alone in the office and when the arts hallway was quiet. I could hear Amanda's music playing quietly from her classroom as she worked on stuff. I could smell Paula brewing a new pot of tea and I could smell wood in the woodshop.

It was nice just being alone in the band room. I got up from my desk chair and I walked around the band room. I sat down at the piano in front of the white board and turned it on. This was my favourite piano to play in the school. It sounded the best and the keys pressed the easiest.

I played a few notes and started to hum, warming up my voice. I played a couple more notes and sang a scale once.

"She just wants to be beautiful  
She goes unnoticed, she knows no limits  
She craves attention, she praises an image  
She prays to be sculpted by the sculptor  
Oh, she don't see the light that's shining  
Deeper than the eyes can find it  
Maybe we have made her blind  
So she tries to cover up her pain and cut her woes away  
'Cause cover girls don't cry after their face is made.

"But there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark  
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are  
And you don't have to change a thing, the world could change its heart  
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful  
Oh-oh, oh-oh  
And you don't have to change a thing, yhe world could change its heart  
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful.

"She has dreams to be an envy, so she's starving  
You know, covergirls eat nothing  
She says beauty is pain and there's beauty in everything  
What's a little bit of hunger?  
I could go a little while longer, she fades away  
She don't see her perfect, she don't understand she's worth it  
Or that beauty goes deeper than the surface  
Oh, oh  
So to all the girls that's hurting  
Let me be your mirror, help you see a little bit clearer  
The light that shines within.

"There's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark  
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are  
And you don't have to change a thing, the world could change its heart  
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful.

"Oh-oh, oh-oh  
And you don't have to change a thing, the world could change its heart  
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful.

"No better you than the you that you are  
No better life than the life we're living   
No better time for your shine, you're a star  
Oh, you're beautiful, oh, you're beautiful.

"And there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark  
You should know you're beautiful just the way you are  
And you don't have to change a thing, the world could change its heart  
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful  
Oh-oh, oh-oh  
And you don't have to change a thing, the world could change its heart  
No scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful." I played the last couple of notes of the song and I heard the door to the band room creak open.

I stopped playing and I looked up. Paula was standing in front of the open door and a smile was on her face. "I thought I heard you playing."

"I was," I replied. I got up from the piano bench and I shut the piano off. "Did I disturb you, Paula?"

"No, of course not. I just like hearing you play. I never get to. All I get to hear is movie soundtrack songs being played by Simon normally. It's a nice change when you play," Paula replied. She came into the room and smiled.

"Does Simon disturb you just to get your attention?" I questioned. Paula nodded.

"It's because he's like a schoolboy with a crush around me and I know he has a crush on me. He's too obvious about it to him to be able to deny it," Paula replied.

_ amanda _

I could hear Alesha singing but I didn't go into the band room to hear her. I had seen Paula go to the band room to talk with Alesha. I felt like an outsider because of how close the arts department was from how well they knew each other and they barely knew me. I had closed myself off from most personal and intimate questions whenever they tried to get to know me. The only person in the department that I knew sort of well was Alesha. I had talked to Paula a couple of times whenever I would have to go into her classroom to get something for one of my drama classes as I had no art supplies. I was waiting on the order of markers, Sharpies, and poster board that I had ordered last week to come in. My students had already done one poster and I had needed to go to Paula's art room to borrow markers and Sharpies and get poster board from her.

I stared at my computer screen, desperate to try and grade something. My students had all written short responses to the scenes of Macbeth that we had read for homework during class today and I liked to stay on top of my grading. I knew I shouldn't grade at school and instead save it for something to do while I was at my flat. I closed my laptop, deciding I would have a late night tonight with the script reading and having to grade when I got home. I took my copy of Macbeth off of my desk and I flipped to the scenes that my advanced drama class were reading for homework tonight. I began to get enthralled in the world of Macbeth, Banquo, Lady Macbeth, and Macduff.

Macbeth was one of my favourite Shakespeare plays along with Midsummer's Night Dream because of the fantasy in them.

[]

I startled when I heard the sobbing coming from a classroom and it sounded like it was coming from the costume closet. I had no idea who it was that was crying but I decided that if they were in the costume closet, they wanted to be alone. I opened the book back up but I couldn't concentrate on reading the lines. I set the book back down and I opened up my laptop again, clicking on the Google Drive bookmark and on the grading software that the school used. If I couldn't concentrate on trying to read the last scene of Macbeth, it would be easier to try to get at least some grading done.

My advanced drama class was small as it was all students that were all going to pursue drama in university and had gotten a GCSE in the subject. One of the boys in my class was actually going for theatre education as he wanted to be a drama teacher after finishing school completely. I had already told him that most schools would hire him with just a degree in theatre and a teaching certificate, which I had, instead of majoring in theatre education that way he would have a backup option if he could not get a job as a drama teacher in a school. We had talked some and he had decided to take the route that I had for the backup option.

I smiled as I read through the short essays that the students had written. I wrote a couple of comments on one of them and I put in the grade for it. There wasn't that many essays to grade as there wasn't that many students in the class to begin with. I took the CD out of the CD player and turned the radio on instead. I listened to the news.

I checked the time on my phone and I still had fifteen minutes to go until the script meeting was due to start. I shut my laptop and I unplugged it from the charger to take with me. I carried my laptop and my copy of the script against my chest as I went to the band room.

The chairs were already set up in a circle, something I had asked Simon to do for me. I sat down in one of the chairs and I set my laptop up to play the music.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys! Uh oh, someone was crying in a closet, any guesses on who it was? What do you think is going to happen next and what did you love about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	10. chapter eight.

_alesha_

Azuka and I had a fight the night before and he had threatened to break up if we fought again. I was scared that he was going to go through with it, especially if he saw me crying. He hated it whenever I cried and we always ended up fighting about it if I did and then the cycle would resume. It wasn't an abusive relationship, Azuka never laid a hand on me to hit me unless I asked him to do it while we were shagging.

But he never hit me outside of the bedroom when we fought. It wasn't in his nature to hit me or abuse me with words but he did threaten to break up each time we fought. We had been fighting more this school year than ever because we were spending more time with each other. Every little thing I did would get on his nerves, even if it was something that I always did and he would force me to do it his way.

Our relationship had become toxic but I stayed in it. I knew that Azuka loved me, even if he didn't say it to me but I was sure about it. He wouldn't stay with me if he didn't love me. We didn't have the best relationship but then again, I didn't really know what a healthy relationship looked like. My birth father had abused my mother physically when I was younger and he would hit me if I tried to intervene with it.

They divorced because of it and my mother decided not to date again. I had flings with boys in school and I would have sex frequently with them. I would be called slut often by other girls, especially after the amputation had been done. In university, I would have one night stands with women and men until I met Azuka.

We had been together for two years and we had rented a flat together, starting on our first anniversary. I stopped having sex with other people after Azuka asked me to be his girlfriend. We didn't talk about the future together, which made me wonder if we did have a future as a couple.

It wasn't that bad. I didn't dread going home at the end of the school day after drama club practice for _Matild_ a, it was exactly the opposite. Azuka had changed his schedule for the dance studio and he would be home now whenever I got home. We would have dinner together, watch a show together, and go to bed and have sex. Our shagging was somewhat passionate.

He would caress my body but he wouldn't touch my legs, especially my left leg. He was scared of it and I couldn't figure out why. He would kiss my body a little to get me sort of ready and he would thrust into me, even if I wasn't ready for it yet. He would make me scream his name on a nightly basis and the orgasms I got from it were good.

"Azuka, I'm home!" I called out, dropping my bag on the couch in the living room.

"I'm in the kitchen, babe!" This was his standard response whenever I came home. He would always be making dinner. "Dinner's done and I've already ate."

I went into the kitchen and I found a plate of food waiting for me in the oven to keep warm. "I'm gonna head to bed. I had a tiring day at the studio."

"Alright. I'll be in bed with you in, maybe, an hour, give or take," I replied. I pulled the plate out of the oven and ate while Azuka got ready for bed. I ate quickly and I got ready for bed myself, slipping into bed, not even an hour later after Azuka got in.

He opened his eyes as I got in and he spooned me, his hand moving towards my breast. He cupped my breast with his hand, toying with the nipple. It made my back arch and I let out a hum of pleasure.

He took my pyjama shirt off and both of his hands went to my breasts. He continued to play with my nipples and he sucked them. He got himself undressed and undressed me the rest of the way.

"You ready, babe?" He opened my legs so we would be in missionary position and he thrusted into me before I could answer or was ready for it, and I moaned in pain.

_ amanda _

I went through the script and I highlighted the cues for the actors and made notes about what the theatre tech club would have to do during the cues. It was a long process so I sat in bed doing it. I glanced at the time on my clock and it was starting to get late but I still had half the script to do and I still needed to get ready for bed.

I set the script so the spine was facing up to keep my place and I took my hair down from the messy bun it had been in. I went into the bathroom and I turned the shower on. I grabbed a fresh towel from the linen closet and hung it on the peg by the shower. The water was almost warm enough for me to get in so I took my allergy medicine and got into the shower.

I stood in the warm water for a minute, my body heating up from the water. I washed myself, washing the blood from in between my legs. My period had started the day before and today had been my heavy day so I had worn a pad instead of a tampon.

Periods were useless to me as a lesbian. I couldn't conceive a child naturally because there was no penis involved in lesbian relationships so a uterus was almost useless to me. I did want to have kids one day before I got too old to be a mum but I wanted to be married before I did. I didn't want to be a single mum as I would need so much help the first year of the child's life.

It would be easier to have a child if I got married to someone. I did want to marry someone, Alesha, but she was straight. It was the school year now so I couldn't be able to have one night stands because of grading on the weekends.

I washed the rest of my body and I washed my hair, rinsing it out in the water. My hands ran down my body, running over the divets of my hips and over the curve of my arse. My body was alright but I didn't like how curvy I was. My hips were too large for someone of my height and my breasts were too small to balance out my hips for my body.

My breasts were average size though. I did wish that they were bigger to balance out my body. I wasn't that comfortable with my body but I had to live with it. If I had sex with someone and they were constantly touching my body, it would make me feel good about myself for a couple of days until the next one night stand.

Cheryl, my girlfriend in uni had been able to do that for me. She had constantly made me feel confident about my body and when we broke up, I started to see the faults of my body and the most important fault of my body that I couldn't change, my face.

I stood still in the warm water for another minute and I shut it off, shivering when I opened the shower curtain as the cold air hit my body. I dried myself off quickly with the towel and went back into my bedroom.

I got dressed into my favourite pair of pyjamas, a pair of rabbit footie pyjamas that I had bought for myself last winter. I pulled the hood over my head so the ears of the pyjamas flopped over my face. I shoved the ears out of my face and climbed into bed.

I picked the script back up and I picked the highlighter back up. I turned to the next page of the script and began to scan for stage cues and actor cues, making notes where needed.

I set my alarm for the next day on my phone and I set my phone on my nightstand, next to the dildo that I had used the night before to masturbate after thinking naughty daydreams about Alesha.

The daydreams had increased in frequency after the script reading for _Matilda_ and they always happened when I was at home or I was in the car going home from a drama club meeting. I set the script on the nightstand, the page that I was on tabbed for the next day and set the highlighter on it.

I closed my eyes and attempted to sleep as I listened to the couple that lived in the flat next to me, Alan and his husband Matt, shag.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [] hey guys. Some interesting revelations here. Azuka is raping Alesha and she hasn't realized it yet. What do you think is going to happen next and what did you love about this chapter? Bye until the next chapter!


	11. chapter nine.

_alesha_

I left the flat I shared with Azuka early, just to get away from him. We had fought the night before after I had told him that I had a long day because of drama club practice and teaching and I didn't want to shag. We had both went to bed angry with each other and Azuka had slept on the couch while I cried myself to sleep.

I hated it whenever we fought, even though the make up sex would be amazing the next night but it didn't seem like Azuka was going to let it rest that I was going to be home late for a while, until the show ended and that would be in late November. I had another month of him whining about the fact I didn't ever want to shag because I was "too tired" to even think about it. I was tempted to break up with him because of it.

Our relationship was getting worse because of our fighting and it had increased since Amanda and I had started swimming with each other on Friday nights after drama club rehearsals ended for the day. He was happy with the fact that Amanda and I were starting to get to know one another.

I hadn't told Amanda about Azuka because I was figuring that Azuka and I weren't going to make it through this rough patch. He had started to hit me outside of the bedroom after I had dropped a glass pan after making dinner because he had snuck up on me to scare me. He was starting to hit my arms or my legs each time that I came home late from school, with good reasons why I was late.

I wanted him out of my life. I had taken to crying in the costume closet because I knew that no one would be able to hear me from the costumes muffling the sound of it. I hadn't told anyone, not even my mother that Azuka was hitting me. It had happened to my mother and I had thought that domestic violence wouldn't be in my life again or become a regular part of it.

I sank down to my arse against one of the band room walls. Simon had already left and there was no drama practice today because Amanda had told me that she had a doctor's appointment that afternoon while rehearsal was going to take place. She had canceled all practices for the musical, including the chorus practice so I was left alone in the band room.

No one was in the arts hallway as far as I knew. Paula had gone home unusually early for her and Ryan had gone home as well. I was the only one left in the department hallway. I stood back up and I turned on the piano.

Music had always been what made me feel better. It had been my birth father that had given me my first electric piano when I was little and I would play it non-stop. I pressed a few keys and I began to play, letting the melody take over me.

"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn  
Well, that's all right  
Because I like the way it hurts  
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry  
Well, that's all right  
Because I love the way you lie  
I love the way you lie  
I love the way you lie

"You ever love somebody so much  
You can barely breathe when you're with 'em?  
You meet, and neither one of you even know what hit 'em  
Got that warm fuzzy feelin'  
Yeah, them chills used to get 'em  
Now you're gettin' fuckin' sick of lookin' at 'em?  
You swore you'd never hit 'em, never do nothin' to hurt 'em  
Now you're in each other's face  
Spewin' venom in your words when you spit 'em  
You push, pull each other's hair, scratch, claw, bit 'em  
Throw 'em down, pin 'em  
So lost in the moments when you're in 'em  
It's the rage that took over, it controls you both  
So they say it's best to go your separate ways  
Guess that they don't know ya  
'Cause today, that was yesterday, yesterday is over  
It's a different day, sound like broken records playin' over  
But you promised her, next time you'd show restraint  
You don't get another chance, life is no Nintendo game  
But you lied again  
Now you get to watch her leave out the window  
Guess that's why they call it window pane." By then, the sobbing had taken over again.

_amanda_

I went to the locker room of the pool facility and I changed into my bathing suit, changing in one of the shower stalls although no one was in the locker room, on the one off day from drama club that I had this month as I had had a doctor's appointment while rehearsal was supposed to be going on. I had gone to the appointment and I had come back to the school to get some swimming in before I went home.

The doctor's appointment had just been a routine one and an assessment by my dermatologist, who specialized in port-wine stains. Nothing had changed about the port-wine stain other than the fact it was now over my ear. The dermatologist looked at the freckles on my chest, a result of not using sunscreen very frequently during the summer hols as a child. I would have to go back the next day after drama club rehearsals to have my gyno appointment done and my mammogram appointment done. I wasn't happy about the fact that I hadn't been able to get all of my doctor's appointments all on the same day and just take a personal day off from school. I had done all of my doctor's appointments all on the same day last year and I had managed to schedule them so they would all be on the same day next year.

I was surprised that Alesha wasn't swimming in the pool as she normally was in the pool every day after drama club rehearsals ended. It was only three-forty in the afternoon so I had expected to see Alesha in the pool swimming or getting out of the pool from swimming. She wasn't in sight at all.

I set my towel down and my phone, getting into the pool. I swam around for a little bit, warming myself up to swim multiple lengths of the pool in a row.

It was strange to be swimming by myself without Alesha swimming lengths by me but I got used to it quickly. I got out of the pool after about a half hour of swimming lengths and eventually timing myself swimming lengths. I changed back into my regular clothes and put on a new layer of foundation after showering in one of the small shower stalls that the school had in the locker rooms.

I had taken to showering at the school after I swam so I always had a face wash with me so clean off the foundation on my face. I make sure that the port-wine stain wasn't visable, or at least not as much and I left the locker room. I drove home to my flat and unlocked the door.

I dropped my bags on the kitchen table and I went to the fridge, hoping to find something that I could turn into a dinner for myself. There was nothing in the fridge as I needed to go grocery shopping desperately. I picked up a take out menu for one of my favourite restaurants and dialed the number.

I order my food and asked for it to be delivered to me. I looked through my text messages after, sending one to my mum because she and my step-father wanted to see me sometime soon because I was completely settled into my flat.

I went to my bathroom and I washed the makeup off of my face. There wasn't a need to wear the makeup I used to cover up the port-wine stain if I was home. I would just try to avoid mirrors unless I was putting on makeup. I put sweatpants on and took off my bra, putting on a sports bra instead.

I went into the living room and sprawled out on the couch, turning the T.V. on as background noise and watching it a little bit. I answered a couple other texts and emails from students about the homework and I went to the conversation that I had been having with Alesha the night before. I pulled up the keyboard of my phone as I typed in:

**Amanda:**

**hey, do you** **maybe** **want to get dinner** **with** **me on saturday so we can get to know each** **other** **better?**

I sent the text to Alesha, watching it go from sending to sent and to delivered. I held my breath as I waited for her to reply to the text.


	12. chapter ten.

_alesha_

**Amanda:**

**hey, do you** **maybe** **want to get dinner** **with** **me on saturday so we can get to know each** **other** **better?**

My eyes flitted across the phone screen as I read the text that Amanda had sent me an hour ago. I had been trying to figure out a response but I couldn't seem to decide on anything. Sure seemed too casual and yes seemed to short but said that I needed her. Saturday nights were when the abuse always hit the highest point.

Azuka didn't let me leave the flat unless it was with his permission and it had come to the point where I was afraid to ask him if I could go grocery shopping because he had eaten most of the food in the flat by himself. He would make it into an argument that he didn't eat that much and he was an easy boyfriend to have.

He was the worst and by far, the hardest boyfriend that I had ever had in my life. Sunday would be quiet days for the both of us. He would apologize profusely for hitting me the day before and during the week and he would give me a piece of jewellery to try to make up for it. It had been the same cycle for the past month.

No one knew about what he was doing to me and I didn't tell anyone or go to the authorities for it. Azuka would kill me if I did but I took pictures of each of the bruises that he left on me so I would be able to go to the authorities in secret and have evidence of the abuse on my body. I wanted to get out of the relationship.

My friendship with Amanda was slowly becoming closer and I wanted to tell her why I had the bruises on my wrist instead of lying her that I was clumsy and fell a lot. Amanda always didn't seem to believe the lies that I was forced to tell her. She had seen many of the bruises but I also covered the worst ones up with waterproof foundation for swimming with her.

I didn't like lying to Amanda and I wasn't the best lier but I was becoming a good was because of the abuse Azuka inflicted on me. I pulled the keyboard up on iMessage and began to type.

**Alesha:**

**Sure. What time and what place?**

I left it at that and sent it to her. A bubble came up on the phone screen, indicating that she was typing a response to me.

**Amanda:**

**does 7 work for you? at my flat probably.**

She typed her response quickly, telling me that she had been by her phone when I had sent her my reply. We went back and forth for a little bit until I had to go to bed. I liked being able to talk to Amanda but I hated having to lie to her. I didn't want to lie to anybody at all because I hated it but I was forced to.

When Amanda had first texted me asking if I wanted to have dinner with her so we could get to know each other, my mind had went to the fact it sounded like she was trying to ask me out on a date with her. I didn't mind it but I didn't like Amanda romantically. I was done with love for now. It had burned me and I didn't want it to become a date with Amanda. I was straight and from Amanda's personality, it seemed like she wasn't straight but I didn't know what she was.

It was impossible to tell with Amanda. Our relationship was odd. We would cuddle with each other during drama club rehearsals, her head on my shoulder but I had had a lesbian relationship in uni and we had been like that. I couldn't tell if Amanda had a crush or something on me because I didn't see her all that often, just in drama club rehearsals, swimming, and sometimes in school.

I shut my phone off and I plugged it into the charger by the kitchen counter. I went into the bedroom and I took a deep breath. Azuka had already gone to bed and he was sound asleep, luckily. I crawled in beside him and while he was still sleeping, he wrapped his arm around my body and pulled me closer to him even though I wanted his arms off of me.

_amanda_

I grinned when I had seen that Alesha wanted to have dinner with me at my flat. I could be able to question her if she had a boyfriend or even if she was just straight. She probably suspected that I was lesbian because we cuddled during drama club rehearsals sometimes when we were both tired. I liked it whenever we cuddled because I could feel Alesha's heartbeat and her breathing above me.

We had a good relationship but I could tell that Alesha was lying to me about her being clumsy. I had seen her dancing and walking. She was graceful and it just didn't match up that she was clumsy and had gotten her bruises because she fell a lot. It was too easy of a lie to see through. Something was happening to her that she had to lie about and I had a funny feeling that it was because she was in an abuse relationship with somebody, male or female.

She refused to talk about her love life to me if I asked her if she had a boyfriend in one of the drama club rehearsals and clammed up for the rest of the rehearsal time with me. I had touched a nerve in her and it was about something she didn't want to talk about. It could have been just because I had asked in a public space, which was why I had told her that we were going to have dinner at my flat so we could get to know each other.

My phone rang and my sister's number flashed across the screen. I accepted the call and put my phone into speaker phone as I got ready for bed.

"Hey, Deb," I said, smiling as I wiped off my foundation.

"Hey! How have those students of yours been behaving? Do you need me to scare them into behaving for you?" Debbie, my sister joked.

"They've been good so far. A lot of them are quiet but they come to life when we're reading plays in their classes. How's my nephew?" I replied. I wiped the rest of my makeup off with another make up remover wipe and tossed the used wipes into the trash bin.

"Mason's big enough to kick his father in the bollocks now and he's gained two pounds since he's been born but he's not sleeping through the nights yet. Jake still has to get up to bring him to me. He keeps insisting on it," Debbie replied. She had given birth two months ago to my first nephew and my mother's first grandchild. Mason was adorable and I had been named as his godmother when he had been bapisted.

"Jake must not be happy about his bollocks then," I responded, laughing a bit.

"He's not. Now he's joking that we won't be able to have a second because of Mason's feet. I've gotten a video of it happening but Jake loves his son to death," Debbie said. Our mum had been extremely happy about Debbie announcing her pregnancy last year because it meant grandchildren. She was still expecting me to become pregnant somehow even though I had told her that I didn't want to be a single mother.

"Mum's still trying to convince me to have a baby. She's awful about it," I replied. "I don't know why she wants me to give her the next grandbaby."

"She just wants to see you in a relationship with someone, I think, Mandy. She keeps going on about the fact that you haven't had a girlfriend for three years," Debbie replied. I heard a baby cry in the background and heard Debbie getting up from either sitting in bed or sitting in her favourite chair. "I've got a hungry baby to feed, Mandy. I'll talk to you soon!"

"Alright! Bye. Love you," I responded. Debbie hung up the phone after she repeated the goodbye and I plugged my phone into the charger. This had been a short call from Debbie tonight and it had been because she was breastfeeding her son and he had needed to nurse him. It was a touching sight to see Debbie breastfeeding him whenever I saw it because Mason had been born eight weeks early. He had been so tiny when he had come out and his head had been so small when he had been nursed for the first time.

I got into bed and rolled over onto my side, desperate to try to get some sleep without needing to masturbate.


	13. chapter eleven

_alesha_

I attempted to get the wrinkles out of my dress as I stood in front of the door of Amanda's flat. I knocked on the door, drawing in a deep breath. I didn't know why I was nervous because I shouldn't have been. It was just going to be dinner with Amanda so we could get to know each other better but it did sound like it was a date.

Amanda opened the door and she greeted me with a smile, bringing me into her small flat. It was a cute, little place and it was an open floor plan. Her kitchen, living room, and dining area were all in one big room with a small wall separating the living room area from the kitchen and dining area. Her place looked like she had been living in it longer than what she had.

Amanda had been living at her for a little under three months now and we had barely gotten to know each other during drama club rehearsals.

"Dinner is almost ready," Amanda spoke. "Do you want anything to drink?"

"Sure," I replied. "I'll just have water."

I sat down at one of the kitchen table chairs and Amanda handed me a bottle of water from the fridge. We talked about how the rehearsals for the musical were going and I came up with an idea to have a lock in at the school for the drama club members before the show.

The props and costumes closets both needed to be cleaned out badly and Amanda and I both didn't have the time to do it by ourselves. It would be easier to make it into a fun activity for the drama club kids to do. Amanda got our dinner out of the oven and she handed me a plate filled with food.

"Do you want wine with dinner, Alesha?" Amanda asked, a smile playing across her lips. I nodded my head. She poured out two glasses of wine and set one of them in front of me.

"Thanks," I replied. I took a sip of it and set the glass back down. "I haven't had wine in forever."

[]

We continued to talk over dinner and I was beginning to slowly get to know Amanda better. We talked about what we liked in relationships and I did mention Azuka. Amanda paled when she heard me talk about my boyfriend but she didn't know about the things that was going on in the relationship. I didn't want to tell her about it.

"What do you see in an ideal partner?" I questioned Amanda. She blushed with the question and took a sip of her wine to stall. We had both finished eating and were onto drinking our second glasses of wine.

"I like it when she's tall and comfortable to cuddle with and easy to talk to. She needs to have a good sense of humour when she's with me," Amanda replied. Her eyes widened in realization with what she had just admitted.

"Are you lesbian or bisexual, Amanda?" I asked, looking down at my empty plate.

"Lesbian. I didn't want you to find out about it," Amanda replied quietly. "I didn't want it to mess with our relationship because it'll always be on your mind that you work with a lesbian and you've been cuddling her during drama club rehearsals."

I wanted to admit to Amanda that I felt safe and loved around her and that I was starting to, maybe, develop feelings for her but I didn't. I stayed silent, not wanting the confession to slip out of my mouth unwanted. She didn't ever need to know and it was becoming obvious that she had romantic feelings for me. She thought that I was straight and I wanted to keep it that way.

"Thanks for dinner, Amanda. I need to be getting back to my flat and my boyfriend," I spoke, getting up from my seat. Amanda looked down at her plate and she mumbled a goodbye to me. I let myself out of her flat and I was starting to regret what I had said. I hadn't intentionally wanted to say that to Amanda and it sounded harsh when I had said it.

I had basically rejected Amanda and had left her by herself. I didn't know how it was going to affect our work relationship and us as friends. Now I was afraid of what I was going to say to Amanda to apologize for my actions.

_amanda_

Alesha had rejected me after I had come out to her unintentionally. I hadn't wanted to come out to her. She was straight and had basically said it when she had left my flat half an hour ago. I was still in the same position and my legs and neck were beginning to hurt. I made myself stand up and I collected the dishes from the table. Alesha had only drank half of her second glass of wine while I had drained mine dry.

I poured what was left of her wine into my wine glass. I drank the wine that I had transferred into my glass in a couple of sips. I put the dirty dishes and Alesha's wine glass into the sink, planning on washing them in the morning. I poured myself another glass of wine, making it my third wine glass.

I sat down on the couch, setting the wine glass on the stand by the arm rest. I traced patterns into the arm of the couch, letting the tears begin to fall. I wiped them away hastily and I took a sip of wine. There was nothing much that I could do to fix my relationship with Alesha. It would be impossible to fix it and with my luck, she would push me away as well.

Our relationship was going to be strained now because I had come out to her and she was straight. I wanted to have a normal female friendship for once in my life. I didn't have that many female friends as most of them would leave when I told them that I was lesbian. I had more male friends than female and I just wanted a relationship where I could relate to someone. That would not be impossible to have with Alesha.

I would have to detach myself from her to try and stop my feelings for her. It was a fat chance that she had feelings for me as well. She had probably already figured out that I had feelings for her. It only made me cry harder with the thought of Alesha trying to block me out of her life because I was lesbian.

She couldn't be homophobic. She was too kind and sweet to me to be homophobic but people always changed. They always changed their feelings about me when the makeup came off of my face and they could see the port-wine stain and they would break up. I was never a perfect girlfriend.

I could never fit the mold that I tried to force myself into. It never worked and it always ended up with me getting hurt in the end. It would be for the best if Alesha and I didn't talk unless it was purely necessary for drama club rehearsals.

But we still had to plan the lock in that Alesha had thought of. I didn't know if we would be able to repair our friendship to do that. It would be impossible to even try. I finished the third glass of wine and I went into my bathroom. I washed the mascara stains off of my face and washed off my foundation.

I turned on the shower and got it, making sure that it was boiling hot. It reminded me that I was alive and took my mind off of Alesha for a couple of minutes while I got used to the heat. I washed myself quickly and dried off just as quickly. I went back into the kitchen when I had pyjamas on, pouring out the last glass of wine left in the wine bottle.

I knew that I was going to regret having four glasses of wine plus half of Alesha's but I needed it. I didn't want to think about her. I didn't care that I was going to end up with a hangover in the morning. I wanted to forget all of what had happened with Alesha.

I drank the fourth glass quickly and set it into the sink with Alesha's wine glass. I went back into the bathroom and brushed my teeth to get the taste of the wine out of my mouth. I slipped into bed and hugged one of my pillows, burying my face into it. The tears started to come again, harder this time and I didn't attempt to stop it.

There was no way I would be able to stop crying. The one person I had romantic feelings for had rejected me.


	14. chapter twelve.

_ alesha _

Amanda and I didn't talk for the next week at all and we were getting closer to tech week and the lock in. We had talked through email about the lock in and we had decided we would be the chaperones for it. Tomorrow night was going to be the lock in and the costume fitting night as we were also going to be picking out and altering the costumes for the show. We only had to size people for it and find the right clothing for the roles. Amanda had actually brought in a pair of hot pink fishnet tights that she had at her flat for the girl playing Mrs Wormwood to wear. I hadn't known that Amanda owned a pair of fishnets, much less hot pink ones.

I hadn't thought that she would ever wear anything like lingerie and the tights proved I was wrong. I didn't tell her that and I hadn't yet apologized for my actions the week before during the dinner Amanda had done for us.

Azuka had been drunk when I had gotten home after the "date" and he raped me and beat me because I had come home late again, when I had promised I would be home by nine o'clock. I was home by nine thirty. I had enough of it. I was planning on breaking up with him tomorrow morning, if he did leave me first because he had been threatening it for the past couple of days.

I sat on the piano bench, writing out grades for my individual chorus classes and instrument classes. I taught the piano and the guitar classes as well but I wasn't that good at guitar. I had my classes do a test grade on how well the pieces were coming along in chorus and a test in my piano and guitar classes on what they had learned most recently.

Drama practice was going to be starting soon, in less than five minutes and I had to be ready for it to begin. We were going to be rehearsing with the pit band that Simon ran for the drama club musicals.

I went into the band room and Simon was running through the pieces with the pit band quickly, most likely the parts that they were still having trouble with. I brought my laptop and the papers I had been grading into the office we shared and I put them away to grade tomorrow night during the lock in when I wasn't needed.

I went back in the auditorium and several drama club members were running through their lines. We were supposed to be off script for everything by now and some kids were still struggling with their lines, and some of them were solos in songs. I sat down in the front row of seats, watching them run through the lines.

The rest of the club came into the auditorium and Amanda came running in behind them, a minute late. Amanda was consistently late to rehearsals but it was always only by a minute. It gave me time to start warming kids up for songs. I sat at the piano, warming students up and Amanda sat down where I had been sitting a minute previously, her master copy of the script in her hand.

I got the students warmed up and Simon brought in the pit band. He wasn't going to be conducting as he was going to be playing his trumpet with the band. It was a yearly tradition of his to play with the pit band as it kept him somewhat in practice by playing challenging pieces. I wasn't going to be playing piano for this musical as we had managed to hire someone to do it.

I could focus on other parts of the songs and correct things that needed to be corrected or altered.

I sat down next to Amanda when I had finished warming the students up. "Places!" She called. The students rushed into their places for the opening number, _Miracles_. If we had any opportunity to talk, it would be now because the pit band had the piece perfect and the kids had it down perfectly as well.

Amanda looked up from her copy of the script in her hands. "Hi," she said quietly. This was the first word she had said to me in over a week that I could start a conversation with.

"Hi," I replied. She smiled and examined her nails.

"I'm sorry for not telling you," Amanda apologized as she watched the kids sing and dance on stage.

"Don't be," I replied.

_amanda_

I looked up from my copy of the script in my hands. "Hi," I said quietly. This was the first word I had said to Alesha in over a week that she could start a conversation with.

"Hi," she replied. I smiled and examined my nails.

"I'm sorry for not telling you," I apologized as I watched the kids sing and dance on stage.

"Don't be," she replied.

"Why not? You should have known I was lesbian from the start because we wouldn't have fought. I should have told you about my sexuality because it's driven us apart," I replied quietly. Alesha thought for a minute and nodded her head.

"It has driven us apart. I do hope that we can still be friends at least, Amanda," Alesha responded. She went quiet again and she looked at the stage as well. The number was half over and it looked fantastic, even without any costumes yet and it sounded amazing.

"They're doing really well with 'Miracle'," I noted. "People are going to love this."

"They will," Alesha agreed. "And they sound really good too but it could be because Simon is over there blasting his trumpet." Alesha giggled and it made me laugh. We were starting to regain our friendship but I knew I couldn't keep my crush on Alesha.

I would have to try to ban Alesha from my thoughts but that would be impossible. I had tried that last week when she had basically rejected me and she just intruded on my thoughts even more but now we were getting back to normal and it was nice.

The number ended and the next scene of the play began. The tech crew run by Ryan and Paula were amazingly quick with the set changes as they had helped out with the drama club sets for years and all of the sets looked amazing. I loved the set for Matilda's room the most. I had gotten pictures of it in the making and of the girl playing Matilda, Hollie, sitting on top of the bookshelf. The bookshelf had to be strong enough to hold her weight but it needed to still appear light and not weigh down the set.

Hollie had to climb from Matilda's bed up on to the shelf as well so it also had to be low enough for her to climb into easily and get down from easily without her hurting herself while she was singing _Naughty_.

I wrote down a couple of notes on the scene that the kids had just preformed and they were halfway into the second scene. The run through of the show went smoothly, better than what I had thought and I reminded the drama club members and the tech crew that was behind the scenes of the lock in that was going to happen the next day.

The students left the auditorium talking and laughing about the run through and the lock in that was planned. I would have to dig up my copy of the _Matilda_ DVD for the kids to watch in the band room after the clean out of the costume closet and the tech closet was finished. At least there wasn't that much that I needed to do to prepare for the lock in.

I went home, ideas running through my head of what I could plan for the kids that weren't helping out during other shifts for cleaning. I would probably ask a couple of the older students that had their own cars to go get the pizzas that I was planning on ordering for them.

I still had to go grocery shopping for the lock in and get junk food and sodas for the kids, Alesha, and I to eat and drink. I had done a lock in before with the school that I had been working previously with the drama club kids and the pit band kids before going to a new one.

I flopped down onto my bed, not wanting to move for the next couple of hours. Alesha had gone swimming by herself, that was how tired I was. I was tired physically and mentally; I had been all week.

It felt nice that my relationship with Alesha was becoming normal again but that was just going to mean that I was going to end up starting to daydream about Alesha again.


	15. chapter thirteen.

_ lesha _

I had done it. We had broken up but it had left more bruises on my body than being with Azuka had. He had abused me when I had tried to break up with him last night but I had done it in the morning. I left him a note, saying why I wasn't there because we were done. I was done with being abused for almost every little thing, done being his sex object. I was done with him. We were done.

I had checked into a hotel that morning as a place to stay until I could get back up onto my feet and rent a new flat. The flat we had shared was in Azuka's name so I didn't want to stay with him. The only person I had to go to was Amanda but I hadn't told her about how Azuka was beating me on an almost nightly basis and coming close to raping me almost every night. I couldn't tell her that Azuka had been doing that stuff to me.

I looked at the prosthetic leg laying on the opposite bed from me and then looked at the stump of my leg that had been left from cancer. It was red and raw, a result of me leaving it on last night because I was going to run from Azuka. I ran from him and checked into the hotel. I kept the leg on for the rest of the night in case he had followed me and now my leg was paying the price for it.

I rubbed lotion gently over the stump, trying to calm the angry skin down before I had to put the prosthetic back on to leave the hotel for the drama club lock in. The lotion soothed my skin and I put a sock over the stump to protect it from further damage. I put the prosthetic back on and rolled my yoga pants leg back down to cover it.

Almost none of my students knew I had a prosthetic limb except for those on the swim team. Only they knew and I asked them to keep it quiet that their coach was disabled. None of the other teachers knew except for those in my department and Amanda. I could trust Amanda but I didn't trust her enough to tell her about Azuka. I didn't trust myself to tell anyone about Azuka.

I hummed as I picked my bag up with my things for the lock in in it and my sleeping bag. I swung the bag over my shoulder and pocketed my phone charger and the room key to my hotel room.

I left the hotel room and I left the hotel, getting into my car and driving to the school. Amanda's car was already there when I got to the lock in and a couple of parents' cars were parked. I was early for the lock in to help Amanda set everything up and a couple of drama club members has volunteered to help with the set up.

Simon wasn't here yet and he had volunteered to be a chaperone for the lock in as we needed at least three adults and we only needed one more. Simon was almost always late. No matter if we texted him to remind him, he would be late and he said he was going to bring Paula.

He had managed to succeed in getting Paula to go on a date with him and that turned into a second and a third date. They were dating steadily now for a month and only I knew about it. The cat would be let out of the bag tonight if they cuddled while they were sleeping as Simon had said he would bring a couple of air mattresses with him.

I pushed open the door to the band room and I was greeted by Amanda.

"You're early!" She said. "Simon's not here with Paula yet and I sense they're doing something naughty to make them late. They've been flirting more and more with each other lately."

"They have," I agreed. I didn't tell Amanda that they were dating as it wasn't my business to tell. "They just need to have a good shag with each other. There's too much sexual tension in their relationship to be healthy."

Amanda laughed and she nodded. "They're probably shagging right now," she replied, still laughing. "Everything is already set up so all we need to do is wait for people to arrive."

_amanda_

The members of the drama club arrived quickly and it was going off without a hitch. A few students who were in the concert band got out their instruments when they weren't cleaning out the tech closet or trying on their costumes or cleaning out the closet, and started playing old concert songs and pep band songs.

It filled the band room with music that was somewhat louder than the music I had playing on the stereo from my classroom. It was turning into a good idea to do the lock in with Alesha, Simon, and Paula. Simon had ended up disappearing into the band room after the students who had started playing and he joined them, as he kept his trumpet at school. Paula had a couple of students helping her dispose of old paint cans that had paint still in them and dragging old sets and broken props out to the dumpster.

Alesha had disappeared to somewhere halfway through cleaning out the tech closet and the costume closet. She had taken a phone call and she didn't return after it but her car was still at the school. It worried me that she didn't return after she had left to take the phone call.

I was too busy to go and find her as I was in charge of cleaning the costume closet and helping people to find their costumes and for some of them, the wigs that went with the costumes.

We had wheeled the rack of costumes for the _Matilda_ musical out into the arts hallway and we were attempting to tackle finding the ripped costumes, the costumes that were attacked by moths, and the costumes that had buttons missing. I put another dress onto a costume rack, the dress being a wedding dress that was extremely dated for 2018. We had sectioned everything into categories and we were putting everything onto the racks they belonged on.

It was a simple task but it kept me too busy to try and find Alesha until the closet was almost all the way organized. I started to search around the school, looking in the arts hallway, down the math department hallway, and the languages hallway. She wasn't in any of the hallways, not even in the science department wing. I went up the stairs to the English and social studies departments hallway and I could hear faint crying from one of the branches that went to a classroom.

I decided to explore, thinking that it was most likely Alesha that was crying. Alesha was in the farthest branch from the stairs, in the branch next to the emergency stair case. She was curled up, her arms holding her legs tightly to her chest and her head was buried in her legs. She didn't look up when I saw her.

Her phone was laying abandoned next to her, a text making the screen light up. I didn't look at the phone as I was too concerned about Alesha crying. I sat down next to her and I touched her left knee lightly, her jumping and looking at me with fear in her brown eyes that were glittering with unshed tears.

"Why are you crying, Alesha?" I asked gently, my hand moving to the top of her back to try to comfort her.

"I-I don't w-want to t-talk a-about it," she murmured in response, being muffled by more sobbing as she buried her head back onto her legs.

"Do you want me to comfort you?" I asked, my hand now rubbing Alesha's back to try to comfort her. She mumbled a yes and she cried harder than what she had been before.

My hand moved the back of her shirt down and I could see a dark bruise on her back. I frowned and worry creased my forehead.

"Alesha, how did you get this bruise on your back?" I questioned gently, lifting my hand from her back and setting it into my lap.

"M-my ex b-boyf-friend," she revealed. "He-he's been hitting me."

She dissolved into heavier crying upon telling me that her boyfriend had been abusing her and recently from how fresh the bruise on her back looked. She hunched over, putting her head in between her legs and she mumbled the same sentence for a second time. I didn't like seeing Alesha like this at all so I pulled her into my lap and she slowly unfurled.


	16. chapter fourteen.

_ a _ _lesha_

I was in the farthest branch from the stairs, in the branch next to the emergency stair case. I was curled up, my arms holding my legs tightly to my chest and my head was buried in my legs. I didn't look up when Amanda saw me.

My phone was laying abandoned next to me, a text making the screen light up. Amanda didn't look at the phone as she seemed to be too concerned about me crying. Amanda sat down next to me and she touched my left knee lightly, me jumping and looking at her with fear in my brown eyes that were glittering with unshed tears.

"Why are you crying, Alesha?" Amanda asked gently, her hand moving to the top of my back to try to comfort me.

"I-I don't w-want to t-talk a-about it," I murmured in response, being muffled by more sobbing as I buried my head back onto my legs.

"Do you want me to comfort you?" Amanda asked, her hand now rubbing my back to try to comfort me. I mumbled a yes and I cried harder than what I had been before.

Her hand moved the back of my shirt down and I knew she could see a dark bruise on my back. Amanda frowned and worry creased her forehead.

"Alesha, how did you get this bruise on your back?" She questioned gently, lifting her hand from my back and setting it into her lap.

"M-my ex b-boyf-friend," I revealed. "He-he's been hitting me."

I dissolved into heavier crying upon telling her that my boyfriend had been abusing me and very recently from how fresh the bruise on my back looked. I hunched over, putting my head in between my legs and I mumbled the same sentence for a second time. Amanda probably didn't like seeing me like this at all so she pulled me into her lap and I slowly unfurled.

"You broke up with him?" Amanda asked quietly.

"I d-did," I replied, still crying heavily. "B-because of t-the a-abuse."

"You're safe now, Alesha. I'll protect you if you want," Amanda spoke sweetly. She rubbed my back gently, trying not to put pressure onto the bruise on my back. "Do you want to sleep with me on my air mattress tonight, Alesha?"

I nodded in response and I wiped the tears with the back of my hand. Amanda continued to rub my back until the sobbing stopped and she handed me a crumpled tissue from her pocket.

"Can I see the bruise?" She asked gently. I nodded silently and I pulled my shirt up, giving Amanda a glimpse of my bra. "It's so big."

She traced it with a finger and she kissed the center of the bruise. "I'll help you make sure that this doesn't ever happen to you again, Alesha," she promised.

"How?" I asked in response. "If it happened once, it can happen a second time."

"Do you have romantic feelings for me?" Amanda asked, avoiding the question of how she was going to protect me from domestic abuse happening a second time to me.

"I don't know. I'm confused about it. It's like I want you as more than a friend but I'm also attracted to men," I replied. "Maybe?"

"That means that you're probably bisexual," Amanda replied, grinning. "Does it help to know what's causing those feelings?"

"It does," I replied. "I think that I do have romantic feelings for you, Amanda."

Amanda's eyes lit up with my response. "Would you be willing to date another woman?" She asked.

"I would. Are you trying to get me to say yes to going out with you?" I replied, my eyebrow raising up in suspicion.

"I am. Would you be willing to be my girlfriend, Alesha? I promise I would never lay a hand on you violently. It would only ever be loving," Amanda spoke.

"Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend, 'Manda," I replied. "Now, I want to see the woman that's always wearing makeup to see her beautiful face without it. The way I've wanted to see your face since the day we met."

Amanda blushed and she looked down. "I can arrange that. I have makeup remover wipes with me but you're not going to like seeing the Port Wine stain," she spoke quietly.

"I know that I'm going to like seeing you without your makeup on, Amanda," I replied, smiling for the first time since I had gotten the call from Azuka.

_amanda_

"I am. Would you be willing to be my girlfriend, Alesha? I promise I would never lay a hand on you violently. It would only ever be loving," I spoke.

"Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend, 'Manda," Alesha replied. "Now, I want to see the woman that's always wearing makeup to see her beautiful face without it. The way I've wanted to see your face since the day we met."

I blushed and looked down. "I can arrange that. I have makeup remover wipes with me but you're not going to like seeing the Port Wine stain," I spoke quietly.

"I know that I'm going to like seeing you without your makeup on, Amanda," Alesha replied, smiling for the first time since she had gotten the call from Azuka. She stood up and dried the rest of her tears.

I got up, my legs having fallen asleep from having Alesha on my lap while I was comforting her. We walked down the hall together and down the stairs. We went into the band room and I got into the backpack of the things that I had brought for me to use. I pulled out the makeup wipes from one of the pockets and we went into the womens' bathroom.

I pulled a wipe out of the package and began to rub it on my face, the Port Wine stain starting to become more visible as I did so. I watched Alesha's eyes grow wider as she saw how large the birthmark was. I wiped off the rest of the makeup that I had on and swiped my face with a clean makeup remover wipe.

"This is what I look like without makeup," I spoke quietly, turning around to face Alesha.

"You look beautiful, Amanda. I can't see why you would want to hide your birthmark with makeup. It's beautiful," Alesha replied. She smiled and she hugged me, her hand coming up to my face to touch the birthmark gently with her hand.

She touched my cheek and she kissed the spot where she touched my face. I leaned into Alesha's touch and she let me place my head against her shoulder.

"You seriously think that this," I said, indicating the Port Wine stain, "is beautiful?"

"I do," Alesha replied. "I think that it's really beautiful, Amanda, and I like the version of you that's not wearing any makeup. You should spend the rest of the night like this."

"Why?" I asked. "People don't want to see it. They never do and they always see me differently after they've seen it. It happens everytime."

"I don't see anything different about you at all, Amanda," Alesha replied softly. She kissed my forehead. "Come on. They've probably figured out that we're missing."

"And they've seen the sexual tension between us," I joked. Alesha laughed and she smacked at my bottom. I dodged the smack and laughed. She kissed me on the forehead one last time and we went out of the bathroom.

I kept my face down until someone remarked that I no longer had on any makeup. It was a harmless comment, just a comment by a secondary schooler that their teacher no longer had on makeup. It felt like the student had called attention to the Port Wine stain.

I held my head up after it happened but Alesha and I stayed quiet about our new relationship. We started to cuddle during the movie as I had blown up the air mattress I had brought and we cuddled in my sleeping bag. Simon and Paula had brought an air mattress to share and they were cuddling or touching each other in some way even before the movie started.

It had been rumoured that the couple had sex in one of the teachers' lounges when they had both disappeared at the same time during the movie and had returned at the same time. Alesha leaned into my arms as we cuddled and I wrapped them tighter around her waist.

She hummed quietly and she leaned her head up to see me. We shared a quick, brief kiss that wasn't seen by anyone as we were sitting in the back of the band room and the kids were focused on the movie.

Alesha fell asleep before I did, her head on my chest and I could feel her gentle breathing for a couple of minutes before I fell asleep myself.


	17. chapter fifteen.

_ alesha _

I could hear the giggling from drama club members at the way Amanda and I had fallen asleep and had stayed for the entire night. My head was on her chest and she had her arm wrapped around me to cuddle me and pull me closer to her. I heard more giggling from students on the other side of the room, where Paula and Simon had slept on their air mattress. I could feel Amanda stirring underneath me and her arm began to move, stroking my arm carefully and gently.

I opened my eyes and Amanda smiled. "Good morning. Pictures have been taken of us cuddling and of Simon and Paula cuddling," she said with a little laugh. I looked over at Simon and Paula and their bedsheets were tangled and their legs were tangled together. Paula's hair was a mess, as was Simon's. Her head was on his chest and Simon was lazily staring down at his girlfriend with complete adoration for her.

"I can see why for Simon and Paula. It looks like they shagged last night while everyone was sleeping," I replied.

"I wouldn't put it past Simon to do that," Amanda spoke softly, her smile widening into a grin. I got out of bed carefully and I stretched. I had left the prosthetic on all night by accident and I was starting to feel the results of it. I needed a new prosthetic as the cup for it was now too small for my legs from Amanda and I swimming together. My legs had gotten more musular as a result and my thighs had gotten larger. I was due for a new one anyways as I got a new one every two years or as needed.

Amanda got out of the sleeping bag we had shared and she started to roll it up, keeping her head down to try to prevent people from seeing it. People had already seen it this morning though and she knew that I thought it was beautiful.

I let the air out of the air mattress to have a reason to bend down. Most people in the band room didn't know that I had a prosthetic leg because of cancer. I didn't like for people to know that I was disabled because it would change their opinion about me and how they talked to me.

Simon even know that I had a prosthetic and I had been working with him for five years. All he knew was that I walked funny for some unknown reason as I never told him it was cancer.

The lock in had gone smoothly and Simon and Paula had left directly after the last student had, needing to go get Simon's son from a friend's house. It left Amanda and I alone.

We had already cleaned up everything and we were now just talking, leaning against one of the walls of the band room.

"Do you mind if I take off my prosthetic?" I asked shyly.

"No, go ahead," Amanda replied. I rolled up the pant leg of my yoga pants and I took off the prosthetic, rubbing the bottom of the amputation. "May I ask what caused you to have a prosthetic again?"

"Yes. I had cancer, osteosarcoma, when I was fifteen. The cancer was just above my knee and it was all the way halfway down my shin. There was no other option to save what had been affected by cancer at that time so it was amputated," I replied. "Azuka never liked it."

"I like it," Amanda replied. "I think that it makes you even more amazing."

I grinned. "Do you want to see the scars from the surgury?" I asked.

"Sure," Amanda responded. I turned around in Amanda's arms and I rolled the pant leg up farther. I lifted the stump that was left of my leg and Amanda could see how ugly the scar was that was left behind from the cancer. She traced it gently with her thumb, glancing at my thigh at the two other scars. "Are these two ones from the surgery as well?"

"They are," I replied. "It where the had opened my leg from to clean the wound they had made and put in cushioning for the bottom of my stump of a leg and to make skin with to cover the stump."

She kissed both of the smaller scars and she cupped the stump of my leg. "You really are amazing, Alesha," she repeated. I kissed her cheek in response, causing her to blush heavily.

_ amanda _

I knew that I was falling in love with Alesha. I had been falling in love with her since we had met but it wasn't the time yet to say it as we had barely begun dating. I was sure about it though. I offered for Alesha to live with me until she could get back up onto her feet and find a flat that she could rent on her own.

She accepted the offer and knowing that Azuka wouldn't be at the flat that they had shared, we gathered her stuff up and brought it to my house. She had asked if we could possibly sleep in the same bed and we were now in the same position as this morning, her head against my chest and my arm wrapped around her protectively.

I could see what was left of her amputated leg clearly through the bed covers and she had movement of it as I could see her leg shifting in bed. I kissed the top of Alesha's head and she blushed.

"You know, Amanda, I really don't mind the fact that you're lesbian. It was kind of funny to see Simon try to flirt with you when we first met and you not even respond to it," Alesha chuckled quietly.

"I was tempted to come out to him to just watch his reaction to the fact he was flirting with a woman that is not even remotely sexually attracted to men," I replied. I smiled softly and began to play with Alesha's hair.

"You should have come out. I could have broken it off with Azuka before things got extremely violent," Alesha responded. She touched one of the bruises on her wrist that Azuka had left on her.

"I could have protected you from being abused physically," I replied.

"That would have been impossible, 'Manda. He was already abusing me by the time we had that _date_ ," she replied. "It only got worse after that. I was too scared to say anything about it."

"You should have said something to me and we could have gone to the authorities about it," I said. I touched the bruise on her bare back lightly. Alesha wasn't wearing a shirt to bed as she typically got hot in the night and would have to end up taking it off anyways.

My eyes flicked down to her bare breasts quickly. The small nipples and areola a chocolate brown. "Eyes are up here, Holden," Alesha laughed. I looked back up at her and she was grinning.

I blushed and replied, "sorry."

"Don't be sorry about it. My tits are just too provocative to you," she replied, grinning. "Maybe I should put on a shirt to keep you from staring at my chest all night long."

"Please don't. I like, no that's not the right word, love what I see when I look down," I replied, a small smirk on my face.

"Maybe I should take off your shirt to see if I like what I see," Alesha said cheekily, her hands going down to toy with the hem of my pyjama shirt. She lifted her head and I sat up and I pulled the shirt off of my body.

My breasts were only a little larger than Alesha's but the nipples were standing erect, a trait that I hated about my body because they always made their appearance at awful times.

Alesha grinned when she saw my breasts and she hummed in delight. "I do like what I see," she said. "And I already know that it's comfortable."

"My breasts are not a pillow!" I retorted.

"Yes, they are right now," Alesha replied. I laid back down in bed and Alesha put her head in the center of my chest. She put one hand over my right breast teasingly and she brushed a finger over the nipple. I let out an involuntary moan of pleasure and her eyes widened.

"Do you like it when I touch your nipples?" She asked, a smirk making its appearance across her face.

"I do," I replied. She touched my nipple and pressed her thumb to it, rubbing it in circles. I moaned again in pleasure and she stopped. I frowned. "Why'd you stop?"

"Because I'm a tease," Alesha responded. "And I'm tired so I don't want to have sex but I can get you horny instead."

"You're a little minx," I spoke. Alesha grinned and she moved her hand to my stomach, nodding.


	18. chapter sixteen.

_alesha_

I dropped the load of laundry I had been carrying onto the bed that Amanda and I now shared. We had been dating for two weeks now and it was already tech week for the drama club. Amanda looked up at me when she felt the load of dry laundry land on the bed.

"You need to help me do this," I said. "You made me do the entire last load by myself, folding included."

I tossed a pair of her knickers at her and she caught them in her hand, laughing hard.

"What if I don't help?" Amanda asked cheekishly.

"You need to help," I repeated, tossing one of her night shirts at her. It hit her in the face and she laughed again, folding the night shirt and setting it on the bed.

"I'll help so you'll stop throwing my clothes at me," Amanda laughed. "Or I'll start doing it to you." She folded the pair of knickers that I had tossed at her and reached into the pile of warm laundry.

I giggled to myself, the mental image of Amanda tossing my knickers at me making me giggle. Amanda grinned when she heard me giggling and shook her head.

We folded the laundry quickly and we were soon in bed with each other, my head on Amanda's chest. She was almost naked in bed, having on just a long t-shirt and a pair of boy shorts knickers and the t-shirt had rode up on her body, revealing her legs and a strip of her stomach.

"How are you this sexy, 'Manda?" I whispered into her ear, making myself blush. This was the first time I had said this phrase in front of Amanda, directly to her though I had thought it many time since we had started dating two weeks ago.

"You really think that I'm sexy?" She asked, doubt crossing her face.

"Yes, incredibly sexy, Amanda," I replied, leaning up to kiss her cheek. Amanda saw what I was doing and she turned her head so I kissed her lips. She kissed me back and her eyes darkened to lust from our kiss.

I allowed Amanda to roll over me so our bodies were touching and we kissed again. Her hands explored my body as we kissed, one hand roaming over my clothed torso and the other roaming up my thigh. I pulled off Amanda's long t-shirt and grinned.

I had seen her breasts before, a couple of times, but I still couldn't help but grin whenever I saw her almost naked in front of me.

"Like what you see?" She asked teasingly, moving her head down my body so she was nipping at my collarbone. I hummed in pleasure.

"I do and I've said it before, I love what I see, not like it," I replied. Amanda's breasts pressed against my still-clothed stomach, her nipples hardening with the contact. She looked up at me before she pulled off my pyjama shirt and her head went back down to my body.

The bruises had healed and they had left no mark behind on my body but there was still the mental scars of what Azuka had done to me still left behind. Those scars wouldn't heal for years and I had already known that they wouldn't heal for a very long time.

"You're gorgeous, Alesha," Amanda muttered, kissing down my cleavage and under my breasts. I let out a soft moan and her hand slipped into my pyjama shorts and knickers. She didn't move her hand, waiting for me to give her permission to touch me there.

I pulled off my pyjama shorts and I guided Amanda's hand to my clit, letting her touch it. Her thumb swiped expertly over the small bundle of nerves, making me moan and her smirk. She moved a finger down to my vagina and she felt carefully to see if I was ready for her.

I knew I wasn't ready yet. I was completely aroused but I wasn't wet enough for her to finger me without pain. She brought her finger back to my clit and she began to rub it in tight circles, making me moan in pleasure and arch my back.

Amanda reached up with one of her hands and began to rub my nipple. The double stimulation felt amazing and I bit my lip to keep from moaning louder. Amanda tweaked my nipples and she nudged open my legs, bringing both of her hands down to my thighs.

_amanda_

I tweaked her nipples and I nudged open Alesha's legs, bringing both of my hands down to her thighs.

"You ready for me to eat you out?" I asked, looking up at her and smirking. Alesha nodded her head and I brought my mouth closer to her nether regions.

I kissed the inside of her thighs, leaving hickeys behind on her sensitive skin, working my way to her vagina. She spread the outside lips of her labia, allowing me to access the most intimate part of her body. I kissed her clit and I traced it with my tongue, making her moan.

I stripped off my boy short style knickers and I raised my body so I could touch myself while I was pleasuring Alesha. I positioned a finger over my clit and pressed on it, making myself moan into Alesha. I began to bit gently at Alesha's clit and she arched her back, moaning loudly in pleasure.

I brought my mouth lower, kissing the outside lips of her vagina and I thrusted my tongue into her. Alesha squirmed with pleasure. I moaned as I began to lick her inside walls, having dipped my finger into my own vagina. Alesha moaned my name.

It sounded amazing to hear Alesha moaning my name with such pleasure when I had fantasized about it for so long. Her hand went to my head and held it in place gently as I licked her.

I pumped my finger at a quick rate, my vagina's walls starting to clench. Alesha's walls were clenching around my tongue and she was moaning that she was close.

Alesha's words were punctuated by moans of pleasure and she came suddenly, her juices flowing down her vagina and onto my tongue. I pressed on her clit with a free finger and she moaned my name loudly as she came.

I thrusted my fingers a few more times and I moaned in pleasure, my own walls clenching around my two fingers in my vagina as I came hard.

I pulled my fingers out of me and I wiped them on my legs as I lifted my head from Alesha's vagina. I moved my body and she closed her legs as I laid down on the bed, breathing heavily.

"You have some of my climax on your face, 'Manda," Alesha said, swiping her finger under my lip to get it. She wiped it on the bed and grinned as she put her head back onto my chest.

I pulled the tangled bedsheets over our naked bodies and I smiled at Alesha. "Was that your first time with a woman?"

"It was and you made it fantastic," Alesha replied, kissing my cheek. "I want to finger you next time though."

"We'll have to see about that. I'm usually a top during sex," I replied. She smirked in response and her hand moved to my breast.

"You up for another round?" She asked teasingly, her thumb rubbing my nipple in a circle.

"I just gave you a wonderful orgasm and you're already ready for another round?" I asked, raising one of my eyebrows.

"I am. I like having sex, especially when my partner respects my body and my wants," Alesha replied.

"And Azuka didn't do that, did he?" I asked. Alesha nodded and she got up to turn off the light.

"He didn't at the end. Not at all," Alesha admitted, getting back into bed. I could feel her breath hitch as she tried not to start crying when I pulled her into my arms.

"It's alright, Alesha. Just let it out," I said reassuringly. Alesha let out a strangled sounding sob as she began to cry in my arms, something that happened most nights that I brought up the topic of Azuka to her. I kissed Alesha's forehead gently and she buried her head in my chest.

"I h-hate w-what he did to me!" She sobbed, the words muffled into my chest. I rubbed Alesha's back in an effort to comfort her. The sobs started to slow down, transitioning into crying.

"I know that you do and I hate it too," I replied as Alesha rolled onto her side, tears still falling down her face. She looked exhausted and I couldn't blame her. She was going through so much already and then she tried to push herself to have sex with me twice in a row.

"Will you hold me all night?" She asked.

"What have I been doing every other night since you moved in?" I retorted, gaining a weak laugh from my girlfriend.


	19. chapter seventeen.

_ alesha _

Tech week was more exhausting than normal for the drama club for me because I was stressed, I was kept up at night crying and I would be restless if I fell asleep crying. I could tell that my sleep patterns and stress were affecting Amanda as well.

She had bags under her eyes that she hid with her makeup but she would cuddle me and kiss me to no end until I was comforted and fell asleep. It had been like this for the past two weeks, ever since I had moved into her flat and we had shagged for the first time last night.

Amanda wrapped her arms around me as I attempted to conduct the band, restricting my movement and forcing me to stop conducting. I turned around and grinned when I saw that it was her that had disturbed me. Simon had asked me to conduct a part that the pit band was struggling with even though opening night was going to be tomorrow night. They had no other trouble with the music except for that one section.

Amanda kissed my cheek and she let go of my waist. "Am I interrupting something?" She asked grinning at me.

"Yes!" I replied. "That sounded better and it's probably the best it will be now, Simon."

"Thanks, Alesha," Simon responded. Amanda and I went back to the seats we had been in to watch the dress rehearsal and once Amanda was comfortable in her seat, I leaned my body against her. My head rested against her chest and I could feel her heartbeat.

I smiled at the sound and Amanda leaned down to kiss me on the forehead. She still hadn't stopped wearing the heavy foundation to cover her port-wine stain at school but she had stopped wearing it at home after I kept telling her that she looked beautiful without the makeup on.

Amanda blushed everytime that I told her that she looked beautiful and the blush would be clearly visible through her foundation if I said it enough or was affectionate enough with her in front of students. We cuddled as we watched the dress rehearsal run all the way through the rest of the way without stopping.

Rehearsal went well but it left Amanda and I tired. We couldn't wait to get back home to our flat and get into bed to cuddle more. I grabbed my stuff from the music department's office and I went to Amanda's classroom.

"Ready to go, babe?" I asked. I saw Amanda blush as she closed her laptop and put it into the case.

"Yeah. I just had to finish a few last minute things," she replied. "There was a little trouble with the printing company that we're ordering the playbills from. They had deleted the file I sent last week to print by accident."

"Did they fix it?"

"They managed to but the playbills won't be here until opening night now," Amanda replied as she put her laptop into her backpack. "I can't wait for the musical to be over."

"Neither can I. Some of the members are beginning to get ideas from us I think. I went backstage and a few people were cuddling and kissing," I replied. Amanda laughed, sounding almost witch-like with it.

"They must be then," she agreed. She slung her back over her back and she walked up to me, shutting the lights off in the classroom. "I'm ready to go now."

[]

We arrived back to our flat later than normal and we had picked up takeout for us to eat instead of making an actual dinner. I logged onto my laptop, an old PC computer that could only hold a charge for about two hours that I had had since university. The computer was close to ten years old but it still somehow worked.

I went on to the realtor website that I found that had flats in London with cheap rents. I put in the location of the school to look for flats near it. A few popped up.

Amanda looked over at the laptop screen from her own laptop, a noodle hanging out of her mouth as she ate her Chinese takeout. "Trying to find a flat?"

"I am. Hopefully I can get back onto my feet by the beginning of next year," I replied.

"Or you could just stay here and live with me. You've already moved in," Amanda replied. "Would you stay with me?"

"I would love to, babe," I said, grinning at Amanda's suggestion.

_amanda_

I had offered for Alesha to stay with me until she could get back on her feet but I wanted for her to continue living with me, not moving out into her own flat. I couldn't believe that she accepted my offer to continue living with me instead of renting a new flat.

I loved the fact that she wanted to continue living with me. It was too soon for me to propose though. We had only been dating for two weeks and it would be a month by the end of December. We had the musical to worry about instead.

Tonight was opening night and I had convinced Alesha to wear a dress that showed off her prosthetic and she had convinced me to wear less foundation that normal. It felt odd without the heavy amount of foundation I normally wore. It was my security blanket to hide the birthmark on my face from the world.

Alesha wanted me to show it off to people because she loved seeing it whenever I took off my makeup and she had somehow convinced me to wear no makeup in the house. I loved it whenever she told me that she thought I was beautiful without makeup. I told her that she was beautiful, especially when I could see her prosthetic or when she wasn't wearing it.

Alesha was insecure in the fact that she wore an almost complete leg prosthetic. Almost all of her left leg was artificial, replaced with metal and screws so she could walk without needing a wheelchair or crutches. She didn't want to seem like she was disabled or make people judge the fact she was disabled. She told me that it was easier for her to hide it than to show it to the world.

Alesha was in a black dress that fell to just above her knees and it had an open back with only a thin strip of fabric against the middle of her back. The neckline dipped down into her breasts, showing off the flat plane in between her small breasts.

I wore a white dress that fell down to my shins and it was tight fitting. The sleeves fell down to my elbows and I wore only a light amount of makeup with it. Just enough to even out my skin but I didn't hide the birth mark like I would normally.

"You look beautiful, babe," Alesha said, wrapping her arms around my waist. "Seriously beautiful."

A couple of students looked at the two of us and more of them glanced down warily at Alesha's prosthetic.

"Thank you. You look beautiful yourself," I replied, turning around in Alesha's embrace and kissing her lips gently. She kissed me back and smiled. "I love the fact I can see those long legs of yours."

"It's a little uncomfortable and cold but I think that I like it. Thank you for convincing me to wear this and I'm surprised it fits me," Alesha responded.

"I don't even know how it fits you. That's a size small and you're a medium or how it fits you perfectly for the length given your legs," I said. "You look amazing in it though."

Alesha carefully studied my face, looking to see if I had gone through with her request that I wore less makeup. She grinned when she saw that she could almost see my birthmark clearly.

"You look beautiful with less makeup, Amanda. Now only if I could convince you to stop wearing makeup all together," Alesha said sweetly.

"Alright, love birds. Break it up. Drama club needs to warm up for singing," Simon said, looking at the two of us as he put valve oil onto his trumpet valves. Alesha and I grinned at him and we kissed each once again.

"Let's get ready to do this," I said. Alesha went to the piano and she began to run scales with drama club. I found myself humming along with them.

All too soon, the drama club members were properly warmed up for singing and I had to go on stage to introduce myself and Alesha to the audience. I wiped my sweaty hands on my dress and I walked out onto the stage.

I quickly introduced myself and Alesha and the musical. The kids were waiting in the wings for each of their cues and the kids were behind the curtain. I left the stage and the curtain rose, beginning the musical.


	20. chapter eighteen.

_alesha_

The musical went amazingly and the next night and the morning performance went well as well. Drama club was over for me as there was only ever one school musical and it was during the Autumn term and preformed in December. Amanda was relieved that drama club was done until mid-winter term when auditions and rehearsals would begin again for the Spring term play. I couldn't wait for us to be able to go on dates with more free time on our hands.

We hadn't even been able to go on a first, proper date because of drama club keeping us both so busy. Now that the musical was over, it was only days before the term break was going to begin for the December holidays. The chorus and band concert was done already for December and it was too soon to begin to pass out new music.

I was still trying to find one last song for the chorus day festival at the school in March. I wanted a love song for the kids to sing.

Amanda laid beside me in bed with her head on my chest as I looked at sheet music for the love song I needed to find. Amanda's fingers were traveling down my torso to my waist, toying with the strings of my pyjama pants.

"I take it you want me to take these off?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes," Amanda replied. She moved her head and I put my laptop onto the nightstand, getting out of bed to take off my pyjama pants. Amanda watched as I kicked them off and climbed back into bed.

"You've almost got me naked in bed," I commented. I had on no shirt and I was now in just my knickers and a sports bra as I put my laptop back onto my body.

"I know," Amanda replied, grinning cheekily. "Because I love seeing your body." Her fingers went back to my waist and she slipped her hand into the front of my knickers, brushing against the folds of my vagina.

My breath hitched and I moved the laptop off of my body. There was no way I would be able to get any work done tonight with Amanda. Her fingers brushed against the folds of my becoming wetter vagina. "Someone's been thinking naughty thoughts," she said.

"I've been thinking about you," I replied, without missing a beat. She grinned and she pulled off my knickers.

"Would you like it if I touched you?" Amanda asked, her eyes darkening with lust and love. I nodded and I pulled off my bra.

Amanda helped me sit up in bed and prop myself up with pillows. She took off her own pyjamas and she hadn't been wearing any undergarments underneath her pyjamas. She got back into bed and she lowered her head to my legs. I carefully spread them for her and I could feel her hot breath tickling my pubic bone.

"Are you ready?" She asked. I nodded and she began to kiss at my inner thigh. Her tongue slid up to my clit and she began to suck on it. It felt like heaven and I moaned, my toes flexing against the bed covers.

Amanda bit down gently on my clit and she released it from her mouth. She went down to my vagina and she began to kiss the lips of it, teasing me to the point of begging. I begged for her to eat me out and she obliged. Her tongue slipped inside of me, mapping out the folds of my vagina.

I closed my eyes in pleasure and my hips lifted up off of the bed. Amanda put my leg and the stump of my leg over her shoulders and she thrusted her tongue in me. A knot was forming in my abdomen as heat built up with the pleasure I was receiving from Amanda. It was over all too soon as I climaxed, moaning her name, and Amanda swallowed the liquid that came out of me. She raised her head from in between my legs, grinning. She lowered my legs gently back down onto the bed.

"Did you like it?" She asked curiously. I nodded.

"I bloody loved it," I replied. Amanda came up to me in bed and we kissed. "Could I try eating you out? I've never done it before to another woman but I've seen it done in porn."

"I would love it if you tried," Amanda replied as she laid down next to me.

_amanda_

I positioned myself on the pillows and Alesha positioned herself at my legs. I spread my legs for her and she lowered her head, her breath hot against my clit. She tentatively kissed my clit, causing me to moan. Her eyes widened with the reaction from me and she did it again.

I pressed a hand to the back of her head, holding her in place. Alesha carefully licked the outer lips of my vagina and she slipped her tongue into me. I was incredibly horny from eating her out and it felt amazing. It had been so long since another woman had eaten me out. It was wonderful.

She began to thrust her tongue, making me writhe and moan on the bed, continuing to do it until I was moaning her name and was close to climaxing.

The warmth washed over me with an explosion that came too soon. Alesha came up from in between my legs, her lips glistening with my climax and my fluids.

"How did I do?" She asked curiously.

"Amazing," I replied. "That was fantastic, Alesha, and you said that this was your first time eating a woman out!"

She grinned and she shut off the bedroom light, slipping into bed with me. I rested my head on her chest and smiled as she played with my hair. She was clearly comfortable in our relationship and happy in it with me.

"I love you," I whispered in the darkness.

Alesha pressed a kiss to my forehead and whispered into my ear, "I love you too, Amanda."

[]

The next day, I went to work without any of my normal makeup on. There was no foundation on my face, no eyeshadow, no concealer, no lipstick. My face was bare. This was the first time I had ever taught without any makeup on and the first time in years that I stepped into a school without makeup on.

It was different, and strange. I felt uncomfortable with it, like I was exposing something I shouldn't have been. I sat down in my desk chair and I took a couple of deep breaths before my first class was due to come into the classroom. I looked at my face with my phone's camera.

My birth mark wasn't all that noticeable, which I had never noticed. I had always seen it as this big, red imperfection or blotch on my skin and that everyone would be able to see it and stare at it until I was forced to hide it. Almost none of my previous girlfriends had seen it. Alesha was one of the only two but she was the only one to call it beautiful.

It was nice to not be wearing makeup. My face felt lighter but all I felt was dread. Almost nobody had seen it in school. Only the students in drama club, Simon, Paula, and Alesha knew that I had a port-wine stain on my face. I had asked them all to keep it quiet until I was ready to stop wearing makeup at work.

I was starting to like seeing it whenever I took off my makeup at night, a total change from what it had been before I had met Alesha or began a relationship with her. It was a nice change.

A couple of students came into the classroom, laughing and they sat down. I shut off my phone and I got out the Shakespeare anthologies that we were going to be using for the week. We were going to be reading _A Midsummer's Night Dream_ and each of the students were supposed to draw either a creature or a character from the play today during class.

It was an easy assignment as we were only just beginning the play. We had gotten through a few scenes on Friday but not much else. This class found the language to be difficult.

"Hey, Miss Holden," a student said as she came into the classroom. "You look pretty today." The student grinned and she took her seat.

I blushed heavily and almost dropped the book that I was holding. A student thought that I looked pretty without makeup on. I would have to see what the rest of the day brought.

"Are you not wearing makeup today, Miss Holden?" Another student asked.

"No," I replied, setting a book on a desk.

"You look nice without it. Your birthmark is cool," the student said. I blushed again and I went back to my desk.

Somehow, two of my students thought I looked good without makeup.


	21. epilogue.

_ alesha _

I smiled as I opened the box from Amanda. We had been dating for six months now and we were going to marry in nine months. Amanda had proposed last week. She had bought me another gift. Amanda was the best partner ever and that was what I told people, especially my students after they had caught Amanda and I snogging one day in the music office when they were looking for me.

Amanda made me feel confident in myself and my body. I allowed myself to show off the prostheitc leg and I liked being able to see it underneath the skirts that I wore to show it off. I tore off the wrapping paper and laughed when I saw that it was another mermaid tail from Amanda. I now had two of them from her.

I looked carefully at it. It looked different. I laughed when I saw that it was missing a part of it's left fin, just like how I was missing most of my left leg.

"Do you like it?" Amanda asked nervously.

"I love it," I replied. "Thank you, babe. I'll have to try this out when we go swimming tomorrow afternoon."

Amanda smiled and I kissed her softly. Her hand wandered down to my hip and I put down the mermaid tail she had given me. We were making love more often, real love, and I loved it. Amanda was incredibly loving in bed and she respected what I wanted and if I wasn't in the mood to have sex. I knew I wasn't in the mood tonight. I didn't feel sexy and there was a good reason for that.

I had decided that I wanted to have children and I began the process a month ago. I had taken a pregnancy test before Amanda and I had gotten in bed. I was pregnant, only four weeks along though but I was pregnant still. I was extremely happy and I needed to tell Amanda my news. The baby would be hers as well. She didn't know that I had chosen a sperm donor that looked like a male version of her. Our baby would look like both of their mothers.

"Amanda, I did a pregnancy test earlier today, when I was getting ready for bed. Guess what it said," I spoke, keeping a neutral expression to not give away the news. Amanda's eyes widened with realization and her jaw dropped.

"You're pregnant?" She asked, her eyes flicking down to my bare stomach. All I was wearing to bed that night was a sports bra and a pair of comfy shorts. I nodded, a smile over taking my face.

"I am," I confirmed. "We're going to be mothers. I'm going to be due right around our wedding date."

"We'll just have to get married sooner or push back the wedding for a while," Amanda replied. Her hand came to rest on my stomach. "We're going to be parents, babe."

She grinned and she leaned down, pressing her lips against my stomach underneath my belly button. Amanda came to rest beside me in the bed, her hand still on my stomach. "I can't believe you're considering me our baby's other mother already."

"We've been dating for six months, 'Manda. Of course you're going to be our child's second mother. Our baby could even end up looking like the both of us. I chose a sperm donor that looks like you, babe."

Amanda grinned. "You're amazing," she said, planting a kiss on my lips. I kissed her back softly. "I love you so much."

"I love you too," I replied, smiling myself. I yawned and I turned so I was on my side. Amanda pulled me close to her and I placed my head on her bare chest.

Amanda felt comfortable in herself now, because of me loving her birthmark and everything about her body. She would go out and she went to work without makeup on now. School had just ended for the school year today, marking the end of Amanda's first year teaching at our school.

"You ready to go to bed now or would you rather celebrate that we're going to be parents?" Amanda asked, a smirk stretching across her face. Her hand came up dangerously close to my breast. I let her feel around for the nipple and moaned softly.

"I want to celebrate us being pregnant and the fact we're going to be parents in thirty six weeks," I replied, smirking back at her.

_amanda_

Thirty five weeks later, Alesha had gone into labor at school but our baby had come too soon to get to the hospital.

Simon helped to deliver our baby girl in the music department office on the floor. Five minutes later, an ambulance arrived with EMTs and Alesha got to cut the umbilical cord herself.

She was absolutely amazed at the fact she had made a baby and our daughter was gorgeous. We named her Ruby and we laid in bed with her the night Alesha had been released from hospital with our daughter.

"She's perfect, babe," Alesha said softly, looking down at our sleeping daughter on her bare chest.

"She is and she looks just like you, Alesha," I replied. Ruby was completely naked on Alesha's chest, allowing us a good look at her tiny body. She had dimples on her bum, just like her mother did and she had her mother's long legs.

Her hair was Alesha's but we had discovered that she had my eyes, which were the same shade as the sperm donor's. She had her mother's long fingers and arms. Her torso was mine though, short with freckles on it.

We had asked for genetic testing to be done on her while she was in utero and all of the tests that had been done had come back negative and she had no trace of a port wine stain on her body.

She stirred in her sleep a little and blew out a soft exhale, snoring like her mother.

"She snores like you do, babe," I joked. "She's so much like you, Alesha."

"I'm scared that we aren't going to be good parents to her. We're both thirty one, Amanda. Is that too young to be parents?" Alesha asked worriedly.

"We'll be fine, Alesha. I promise. We're going to be learning. All parents go through it when they have their first born and we aren't too young. There are girls out there who are getting pregnant as teenagers," I replied.

"You're carrying our second though. I don't ever want to go through the pain of giving birth again," Alesha said, grinning. "I'm good with only once."

"I'll carry the second then," I agreed. "And the third, if we want three children."

"Let's wait a while before we have a second baby. I want Ruby to be at least a year old before we start the process again of trying to find a sperm donor and getting pregnant," Alesha replied.

She smiled as Ruby leaned down to her mother's nipple in her sleep, taking it in her mouth lazily and trying to nurse.

"Is she actually getting any milk from you right now?" I asked.

"No, she's not. I don't feel any coming out," Alesha replied. "Scratch that. She is nursing in her sleep."

Breastmilk dribbled out of Ruby's little mouth as she nursed while she was asleep. Her eyes opened blearily and she looked at what she was doing, looking a little surprised at herself.

Alesha giggled at it and she supported Ruby's head as she nursed.

I rested my head on Alesha's shoulder, watching Ruby nurse from her mother's breast. "I love you so much, Alesha. You're amazing for carrying our first baby and agreeing to have a baby when we're only engaged."

"I love you too, Amanda," Alesha replied. "Wonder if she'll be a good swimmer."

"If she's anything like her mother, she is."


End file.
